WEBVTT

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And we're going to continue with our Bible study here in the book of Genesis.

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Of course in chapter 33 we have Jacob returning back to the land that God had commanded him to come back to.

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But of course we see that he has partial obedience because he doesn't fully return to Bethel.

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He ends up actually coming back to Sheikah.

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And so we see here that it actually poses a major problem.

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And the principle that we can learn there is that when you have partial obedience,

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when you don't fully commit to the things that God commands us to do,

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there's obviously going to come problems because of that, right?

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Because he goes to Sheikah at the letter end of chapter 33.

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And the Bible says that he buys a parcel of land.

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He has the tent that he builds there.

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So he's essentially implying here that he's going to be in this particular area for quite some time.

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And it ends up posing a major problem for his family and of course for his daughter.

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And that's what we're going to look at tonight.

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Dinah wanting to see the daughters of the land.

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It says in verse number 1 of chapter 34.

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And Dinah, the daughter of Lea, which she bared unto Jacob,

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went out to see the daughters of the land.

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And when Sheikah was the son of Heimor, the High Vibe,

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Prince of the country saw her.

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He took her and lay with her and defiled her.

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So obviously not a whole lot of information is being given to us of how this specifically took place.

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We have Dinah, who's one of the daughters of Jacob,

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out of curiosity wanting to go into the land of Canaan

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and kind of out of curiosity just kind of explore the daughters of the land.

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And people can interpret this in various ways.

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Obviously we can extrapolate the fact that she's by herself.

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She doesn't necessarily have her brothers with her.

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She definitely doesn't have her parents with her.

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And this kind of demonstrates here that when a daughter is out from under her authority,

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her protective authority, she can get into a lot of trouble, right?

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She's out there seeing the daughters of the land.

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But instead of seeing the daughters of the land,

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someone actually sees her, right?

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Which is the son of Sheikah, or excuse me, the son of Heimor.

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And of course what we have here, he takes her.

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He lays with her and he defiles her.

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So what kind of sin is being taken place here?

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Well, we have fornication taking place.

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And fornication is a major sin in the Bible.

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Obviously it's not on par with the sin of adultery,

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as noted by the fact that the Bible institutes the death penalty for adultery

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later on in the book of Exodus.

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However, fornication is still wrong.

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It's still a form of defilement.

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It doesn't please God and of course it doesn't please the parents.

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So you have a major sin taking place here

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and it's all because there was no separation between Dina

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and those of Canaan, okay?

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So what's the principle that we can learn here?

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Well, we see here that parental proximity to the world

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often determines what happens to our kids, right?

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We have Jacob deciding to live in close proximity

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to the men of Shechem,

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which ultimately results in Dina being defiled by a man of Canaan.

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And what we can learn here is that we need to make sure as parents

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that we steer clear of the world,

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especially for the sake of our children, right?

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Making sure that we're not constantly on the border of the world,

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causing our children to have worldly appetites,

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worldly companions, worldly ideologies

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because that can eventually defile them in the long run.

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Now a good example of this we've already gone over is Abraham, right?

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And of course Abraham, to a certain degree, did worse than what we see Jacob doing here

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because he actually went into Egypt.

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And when he goes into Egypt, he takes his family with him.

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We see that Abraham ends up bouncing back spiritually,

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but his nephew Lot didn't bounce back, right?

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He ends up developing an appetite for Egypt to the point that

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when they return, Abraham gets right with God.

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He goes into Bethel, but Lot wants to pitch his tent towards Sodom,

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eventually causing him to live in Sodom,

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eventually causing him to lose his entire family,

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and eventually causing him to unfortunately commit incest with his daughters.

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And so his family went into complete disarray and destruction

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and we can all point back to Abraham going into Egypt,

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which is a picture of the world,

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thereby developing these appetites in his family.

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And so we have somewhat of a similar example here with Jacob

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because Jacob was supposed to go to Bethel,

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but instead of going to Bethel, he goes to Sheikham,

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he pitches his tent there with his family,

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and then essentially invokes curiosity within Dinah

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to go see the daughters of the land.

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And what's another principle that we can learn here?

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You know, we need to make sure that we pay attention to the friends

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that our children have, okay?

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Meaning that, you know, obviously our kids are often curious,

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they want to know what's out there,

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and it's our job as parents to essentially provide

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the guidelines and parameters of what type of friends

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and associations they're going to have.

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And you know what?

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Sometimes that is, you know, the responsibility,

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it can be a grievous responsibility

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because sometimes we've got to tell our kids like,

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hey, you can't hang out with your unsaved cousins or something,

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with these unsaved people, with the unsaved neighbors,

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you know, because of the fact that we don't really know them, right?

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We don't know what they do.

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And here's the thing, folks, is that obviously we don't want

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to become Amish here, we don't want to be weird about it,

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and so, you know, there's nothing wrong with having associations

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and so forth, but they need to be supervised, right?

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For example, you know, my kids, they have,

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they don't have necessary close relationships

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with the kids in our neighborhood,

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but you know, whatever associations they do have,

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we always make sure that it's supervised.

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Because here's the thing, folks, it only takes a couple

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seconds to defile your kids.

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It only takes one image to defile the kids.

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You're like, well, you know, that kid is good.

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I think his parents are great, and so they can go

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and hang out in a dark corner somewhere.

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I'm just going to let my little Peabody go into their room,

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and so, you know, the mom's great, the dad's great,

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everything's good.

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My little point dexter will never do anything wrong.

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Yeah, but here's the thing, folks, is that their point

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dexter might do something wrong, though.

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And if they're unsaved, you're like,

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well, they say that they're Christians.

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Well, even if they say they're Christians, though,

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you just don't know what kind of Christians they are,

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and you're like, well, I think they're saved.

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Yeah, but even if they're saved, you just don't know

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what standards they might have.

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You don't know what they're involved in.

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You don't know if the parents are super lenient

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with their kids, what they allow them to do,

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what they allow them to watch,

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and I'm just telling you right now,

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it only takes a couple seconds for that kid

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to say, hey, watch this video.

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Here, watch this image and just completely defile

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the mind of your children, okay?

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And so you're like, man, I just don't want to be too strict.

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Well, in my opinion, it's better to just be too strict,

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be too careful, than to be too lenient,

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and then you end up destroying the innocence of your child,

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not because you wanted to,

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but because you placed them in Sheikham, you understand?

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You were too close to Sheikham,

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and thereby causing Dinah

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to want to go see the daughters of the Lamb.

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And I'm thinking to myself when I read this story,

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you have Simeon and Levi

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just kind of going overboard

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on the punishment on the men of Sheikham,

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but it's like, why didn't you supervise her?

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Why didn't you go with her,

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take her to the market, go with her?

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Why did you let her go by herself to Sheikham

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where these potential dangers are?

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It's better that you would have supervised her,

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and obviously, we can't protect our kids

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100% of the time,

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but we can for sure do our best

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to make sure that we can provide some sort of protection

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by keeping them from the worldly cousin,

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from the worldly uncle,

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from the worldly neighbor, whatever it may be,

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because we just don't know.

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And you say, well, I think you're exaggerating.

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Well, look, I got saved when I was 21,

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and so I was 21 years in the world,

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and I'm just going to tell you right now,

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there's a lot of bad influences in my life.

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I had a lot of bad influences.

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I had a lot of bad cousins.

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Now the one I'm going to go see tonight was not a bad cousin.

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I grew up with him, and it devastates me.

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I do apologize for just getting emotional like that

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because it does hurt me a lot,

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and I don't want to think about it right now,

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but he was a good cousin,

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but I'm just going to tell you right now,

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I had bad cousins too.

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I had really bad cousins.

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I had really bad friends.

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And you know what, my mom did her best

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to make sure that we weren't around bad influences,

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but you can't really protect your kids 100% of the time.

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You have to instill convictions in them,

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but you also have to set parameters and guidelines

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and not place them in sheikahm,

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thereby causing them to possibly be around

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the wrong types of people.

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You say, well, aren't church people

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the right type of people?

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In my opinion, they are,

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but just because people are in church

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doesn't mean you should just give everyone

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just unfettered access to your kids

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because you just don't know sometimes, you understand?

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And so better to be strict now,

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better to just keep track of

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who your p-body's with,

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who your daughters are hanging around with,

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than to just trust everyone

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and then regret it later

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when something arises like what happened to Dina.

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Now look folks, thankfully Dina

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wasn't brutally murdered or something, right?

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You just don't know.

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Luckily she wasn't murdered.

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Luckily some horrific thing didn't happen.

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However, I'm sure Jacob and of course her brothers

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were grieved over the fact

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that she committed fortification

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with the guy of the land.

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Dads, let me just say this is that

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we need to make sure that we do our best

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to get our daughters to the wedding altar

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a virgin, right?

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We need to make sure that we protect our daughters

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and make sure, and look,

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I'm not imposing this standard on anybody here

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but this is the standard that I have

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is that I will be heavily involved in the,

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and when I say heavily I don't mean like

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Amish heavily, I'm saying,

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but I will be involved in the dating relationships

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of my daughters, of my sons too

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but more so my daughters.

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You know, I don't want my daughters

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just getting involved with some guy

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and it's just like, well, honey,

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whatever makes you happy.

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I need to make sure I protect my daughter

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from some weirdo out there

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who might be like this guy right here, right?

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And so it's important for us as parents

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to make sure that we do our best

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to protect our kids

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and it starts with, as we see here,

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not being in close proximity to Sheikah.

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Just go back to the house of God,

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go back to Bethel,

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make sure you have Christian convictions,

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you make your home a Christian home,

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you talk about the Bible with your kids,

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you talk about these biblical standards and so forth

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and then on top of that, do your best

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to just protect them as much as you possibly can.

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And look, don't let your kids out of your sight.

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You know, oh man,

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and especially in the day and age in which we live,

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here's another standard that I have

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for my kids and I'm not imposing it upon you

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but it wouldn't be a bad idea if you also

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integrated this into your parenting.

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None of my kids are going to have cell phones

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for a really long time.

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In fact, I don't see a problem with my daughters

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not having to cell phone until they just

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get married or something.

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Why would they need to?

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Who do they need to contact?

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I'm right here.

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Any contact with them?

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I'm right here.

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Oh, that's just so, that's excessive.

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You know how many things people could do

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on their phones now?

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You know how much they can just

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contact people and go behind your back

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and talk to people online

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and Snapchat this and Instagram that

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and look folks, these young people

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they could be sneaky.

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They could be very sneaky.

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You're like, well, I checked their phones.

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They know how to erase stuff.

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They know technology better than you do.

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Now if you feel like, well,

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I'm going to give my kids cell phones

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and I just feel like I have a pulse

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on how they operate.

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More power to you.

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But I just don't want to risk it

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because it's a computer in their pocket.

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You just don't know what's happening.

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You don't know what kind of ideologies

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and ideas the person on the other side

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who they're talking to is placing in them

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that will we have them turn in their cell phones?

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Yeah, but here's the thing.

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What about when they actually have it?

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And you're like, well, I can look through

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the text messages.

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That's not the only way.

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That's not the only way people communicate.

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People communicate in different ways.

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And look, if you've been in the world,

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you know for a fact people can be sneaky

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because we were sneaky.

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Right?

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Can I get a witness here?

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I'll be the only one to admit that.

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Because I know you guys are all saints

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and holy and all.

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Look, I was sneaky.

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And I figured out how to be sneakier

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as the years went by.

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And so don't think for a minute

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that your little pee body is not going to understand

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how to be sneaky and keep things from you

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if you place them in that position

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to be tempted to do so.

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Now another part that I want to mention

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in this regard is that

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obviously it's important for us to have rules

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for our kids, standards for our kids,

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biblical convictions for our kids.

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I think that's extremely important.

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Explain to them what your expectation

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is of your children and so forth.

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But also think it's important for you

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to make sure that you win your children's hearts.

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Now what do I mean by that?

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I mean that you have such a good relationship

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with your kids that they don't keep things from you.

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That they're willing to just divulge

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maybe some of their temptations to you.

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Some of the things that they struggle with.

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Some of the things that they,

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maybe being embarrassed about to talk to people,

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it's important for us as parents

14:18.160 --> 14:21.320
to do our best to win the hearts of our children

14:21.320 --> 14:23.940
so that they're not keeping things from us.

14:26.200 --> 14:27.580
Dianna's not saying,

14:28.340 --> 14:30.700
I kind of have this desire to want to do this

14:30.700 --> 14:33.700
because it's important for Dianna to go to mom,

14:33.920 --> 14:34.640
to go to dad and say,

14:34.700 --> 14:36.700
hey, I want to go see the daughters of the land.

14:36.980 --> 14:38.220
I want to see what's out there.

14:39.080 --> 14:40.440
And then for the parents to come in and say,

14:40.500 --> 14:41.880
there's nothing wrong with that

14:41.880 --> 14:43.000
but we're going to go with you.

14:43.740 --> 14:44.920
There's a lot of dangerous things

14:44.920 --> 14:46.160
that can happen to you out there.

14:46.500 --> 14:47.600
You're a child of God.

14:48.320 --> 14:50.020
Satan's out to try to get you,

14:50.320 --> 14:51.220
to defile you.

14:51.640 --> 14:52.860
There's a lot of bad people out there

14:52.860 --> 14:54.880
and so we want to make sure that we're careful.

14:55.220 --> 14:56.280
Let's all just go together.

14:56.580 --> 14:58.380
Let's go as one big happy family.

14:59.480 --> 15:01.980
And so when your children's hearts

15:01.980 --> 15:03.580
spend time with your kids,

15:04.000 --> 15:05.160
and when I say spend time with them,

15:05.220 --> 15:07.480
I mean have conversations with your children.

15:09.580 --> 15:12.060
Meaning that have heart to heart

15:12.060 --> 15:13.440
conversations with your children.

15:14.780 --> 15:19.200
Make sure that you have conversations with them

15:19.200 --> 15:21.500
where they entrust you with information

15:21.500 --> 15:23.860
that they maybe otherwise wouldn't tell you

15:23.860 --> 15:25.480
if you didn't have their relationship with them.

15:25.800 --> 15:27.000
And look, I know what I'm talking about

15:27.000 --> 15:30.060
because again, I was an unsafe person

15:30.060 --> 15:31.820
at one point in time in the world

15:31.820 --> 15:33.980
and yes, I did keep things from my mom.

15:34.200 --> 15:36.420
Sorry mom, you know, it's true.

15:36.620 --> 15:39.080
I think everyone did to a certain degree, right?

15:39.660 --> 15:40.480
It's just how it is.

15:41.220 --> 15:43.680
And you know, just navigating through life

15:43.680 --> 15:45.500
as a worldly teenager,

15:45.900 --> 15:47.680
I know that that could be the propensity

15:47.680 --> 15:50.340
for kids to do as they grow older.

15:50.340 --> 15:53.300
And look, there's nothing wrong with Dina wanting to get married.

15:53.400 --> 15:56.620
There's nothing wrong with Dina even liking this guy

15:56.620 --> 15:58.420
but just going through the proper channels

15:58.420 --> 15:59.680
would have helped a lot more, right?

16:00.680 --> 16:02.820
And so we, there's nothing wrong

16:02.820 --> 16:04.500
with Dina wanting to get married

16:04.500 --> 16:07.080
but you know, we need to make sure

16:07.080 --> 16:10.580
that we aid Dina in doing it the right way.

16:10.900 --> 16:11.220
You understand?

16:12.380 --> 16:14.100
Instead of her just going out on her own

16:14.100 --> 16:15.300
and then committing fornication

16:15.300 --> 16:17.100
and then you have this big problem on your hands.

16:17.460 --> 16:18.840
And so that's important to know.

16:18.840 --> 16:21.320
So parental proximity to the world

16:21.320 --> 16:24.480
can often situate your children and your family

16:24.480 --> 16:26.360
to do wrong things, right?

16:26.480 --> 16:28.020
To commit sin or whatever it may be.

16:28.540 --> 16:30.200
And look, folks, let's just be honest.

16:30.480 --> 16:31.840
You know, you need to make sure

16:31.840 --> 16:34.500
that the people who influence your children the most

16:34.500 --> 16:36.860
are you, okay?

16:37.500 --> 16:38.900
You know, I'm going to influence your kids

16:38.900 --> 16:39.660
from the pulpit.

16:40.020 --> 16:41.340
There might be people in our church

16:41.340 --> 16:42.880
that influence your children

16:42.880 --> 16:44.240
but you need to make sure

16:44.240 --> 16:45.020
that you have a pulse

16:45.020 --> 16:47.680
on who actually influences your children the most.

16:48.300 --> 16:50.360
You know, my father-in-law used to say,

16:50.520 --> 16:52.480
you know, you need to beware of the uncle.

16:53.280 --> 16:54.800
You need to beware of that cousin

16:54.800 --> 16:56.760
because you just don't know sometimes.

16:57.300 --> 16:58.920
Like, well, you know, he's my brother.

16:59.520 --> 17:01.620
Oh, you know, she's my sister or whatever.

17:02.120 --> 17:03.280
Yeah, but you just never know.

17:04.420 --> 17:05.280
Just never know.

17:06.140 --> 17:06.880
And you know what?

17:07.020 --> 17:07.840
You might think to yourself,

17:07.980 --> 17:08.940
well, I don't want to be offensive

17:08.940 --> 17:09.820
towards my brother.

17:09.920 --> 17:10.700
I don't want to be offensive

17:10.700 --> 17:13.020
towards my sister or my relative.

17:13.540 --> 17:14.940
Yeah, but you're going to be offended though.

17:15.760 --> 17:16.740
You're going to be offended

17:16.740 --> 17:20.880
when that person poisons your children, you know,

17:21.040 --> 17:23.000
and defiles them, okay,

17:23.380 --> 17:24.640
and then later on you regret it.

17:25.320 --> 17:26.780
So it's important for us to even recognize,

17:26.960 --> 17:28.640
and I'm not saying be suspicious of everyone.

17:28.840 --> 17:29.960
I'm just saying like, you know,

17:30.040 --> 17:31.420
have some wisdom about yourself

17:31.420 --> 17:33.420
to know like I'm just not going to let my kids

17:33.420 --> 17:35.580
go hang out with just any Tom, Dick and Harry

17:35.580 --> 17:37.700
just because they have the last name here.

17:38.980 --> 17:39.260
Okay.

17:40.360 --> 17:41.240
And so, you know,

17:42.020 --> 17:42.860
you need to make sure

17:42.860 --> 17:45.480
that you take care of your kids.

17:45.480 --> 17:48.140
Obviously it's important to provide for them,

17:48.400 --> 17:50.960
but equally important to protect them

17:50.960 --> 17:54.120
from dudes like this, like Hamor, who, you know,

17:54.520 --> 17:56.560
and look, Hamor, according to the passage,

17:56.920 --> 17:59.420
was the most honorable of the guys in the land.

18:00.420 --> 18:01.660
And you know, this is what the Bible says.

18:01.800 --> 18:03.060
He's like, he was more honorable

18:03.060 --> 18:04.460
than everyone else.

18:04.820 --> 18:05.700
And you're like, oh, that's good.

18:06.220 --> 18:08.920
I guess because he's willing to fornicate

18:08.920 --> 18:09.820
and then get married later.

18:10.320 --> 18:11.920
If that's what you consider honorable, right?

18:12.420 --> 18:13.240
That's kind of showing you

18:13.240 --> 18:14.900
what the standard of the land was.

18:15.780 --> 18:16.620
That's basically what it's saying.

18:17.340 --> 18:18.580
When it's saying that he's the most honorable,

18:18.800 --> 18:20.360
it's essentially demonstrating to you

18:20.360 --> 18:23.040
what the standard, what was the best guy out there.

18:23.080 --> 18:24.720
The best guy is willing to sleep with you

18:24.720 --> 18:25.660
before he marries you.

18:27.320 --> 18:28.320
And you know, there's tons of guys

18:28.320 --> 18:29.160
like that out in the world.

18:30.380 --> 18:30.600
Okay.

18:31.680 --> 18:33.820
And so, and by the way,

18:33.920 --> 18:35.520
there's a major biblical principle

18:35.520 --> 18:36.780
that's being violated here.

18:37.100 --> 18:38.740
And that is that Hamor and the family,

18:38.880 --> 18:39.560
they're not believers.

18:40.780 --> 18:41.560
Not saved.

18:42.780 --> 18:45.120
And so, you know, there's a major issue here.

18:45.620 --> 18:47.480
She's fornicating with an unbeliever.

18:47.600 --> 18:49.660
She's going to get married to an unbeliever.

18:50.000 --> 18:51.380
There's all kinds of violations here.

18:52.240 --> 18:53.780
So it's important for us

18:53.780 --> 18:55.060
that even when they're little,

18:55.240 --> 18:56.340
we're explaining to them

18:56.340 --> 18:58.200
what our expectations are of them,

18:58.580 --> 18:59.960
you know, for their life.

19:00.520 --> 19:01.540
Oh, they're too little for that.

19:01.740 --> 19:02.360
I don't think so.

19:03.220 --> 19:03.900
I don't think so.

19:03.980 --> 19:04.620
And look, our kids,

19:04.780 --> 19:06.200
when they're little, they want to please us.

19:07.040 --> 19:08.720
They want to know, you know,

19:08.760 --> 19:10.040
what makes mom and dad happy.

19:10.040 --> 19:12.820
And I explained to my kids what makes us happy.

19:13.100 --> 19:14.980
And I explained to them what I want them to do

19:14.980 --> 19:15.560
when they grow up.

19:15.820 --> 19:17.700
Not, you know, I don't impose on them,

19:18.080 --> 19:19.460
you know, what their career is going to be,

19:19.780 --> 19:21.240
or if they're going to make money or not.

19:21.460 --> 19:24.740
I impose upon them what the biblical conviction is,

19:24.780 --> 19:26.420
which is, you know, you should marry

19:26.420 --> 19:28.600
a believer, a Baptist,

19:29.020 --> 19:30.460
making sure they have these standards.

19:30.940 --> 19:32.200
And yes, I will be involved.

19:32.460 --> 19:33.580
And look, you know,

19:34.320 --> 19:36.260
my father-in-law was heavily involved.

19:37.340 --> 19:38.660
A little too much in my opinion,

19:38.660 --> 19:40.900
but, you know, it was up to him, though, you know.

19:41.280 --> 19:43.560
He had every, like, God's not going to punish him

19:43.560 --> 19:44.200
for that at all.

19:44.800 --> 19:46.600
You know, he's not going to criticize him at all

19:46.600 --> 19:48.800
for that because he had every single right

19:49.580 --> 19:52.800
to impose all of those crazy standards

19:53.220 --> 19:54.000
that he had.

19:55.120 --> 19:57.640
Those crazy outlandish standards

19:57.640 --> 19:58.480
that he had for me,

19:58.800 --> 20:01.140
he had every right to do so.

20:01.700 --> 20:01.940
Okay?

20:02.540 --> 20:03.620
But, you know, looking back,

20:03.920 --> 20:05.980
as outlandish as I believe they still are.

20:08.080 --> 20:09.260
And I'm talking about crazy.

20:10.600 --> 20:10.740
Okay?

20:11.440 --> 20:14.300
I'm talking about, like, offensive standards at times, you know.

20:16.640 --> 20:18.900
You know, just to give you a taste of it, okay?

20:19.520 --> 20:22.620
I'm talking about background checks, you know.

20:23.320 --> 20:26.100
And he's just like, go get an HIV test

20:26.100 --> 20:26.940
because I just want to know.

20:28.300 --> 20:30.260
I'm like, hey, what am I, a homeowner or something?

20:32.900 --> 20:35.080
And he's like, background, I want to know,

20:35.080 --> 20:36.940
credit, he just got everything.

20:37.060 --> 20:40.320
He's just got all the information about me.

20:41.500 --> 20:42.160
Everything, Paul.

20:42.480 --> 20:44.000
And, you know, in my mind, I'm like, that's excessive.

20:45.280 --> 20:46.400
And yes, it was excessive,

20:46.500 --> 20:48.800
but he has every right as a father to do that, though.

20:49.760 --> 20:50.320
And you know what?

20:50.380 --> 20:51.620
If I didn't like it, I could have just been like,

20:51.640 --> 20:52.540
okay, this is too much.

20:52.620 --> 20:53.180
I'm not going to do it.

20:54.100 --> 20:55.860
But, of course, my wife was worth it.

20:56.820 --> 21:00.980
You know, Sarah was very much worth all of that, okay?

21:01.340 --> 21:03.400
And I'm not trying to give dads any ideas here of that

21:03.400 --> 21:05.660
because obviously I'm not going to be as excessive

21:05.660 --> 21:06.580
as my father-in-law,

21:06.860 --> 21:09.780
but he did teach me the importance

21:09.780 --> 21:12.800
of making sure that you're involved, though, okay?

21:13.200 --> 21:14.720
And not just letting your daughter date

21:14.720 --> 21:16.640
any Tom, Dick and Harry or whatever may be.

21:17.120 --> 21:18.780
And look, the standard I'm going to have for my kids

21:18.780 --> 21:20.740
is just like, you're not just going to go around dating

21:20.740 --> 21:22.720
a bunch of different people, either.

21:23.460 --> 21:24.920
The purpose of dating is to get married.

21:25.780 --> 21:26.820
It's not high school.

21:27.320 --> 21:29.480
It's not the world where you just want a companion

21:29.480 --> 21:31.020
for a couple of months or something like that.

21:31.020 --> 21:34.020
You should have the intent to date someone

21:34.020 --> 21:37.120
because you actually have the intent to marry them, okay?

21:37.780 --> 21:40.260
And so, you know, this is what I'm teaching my boys.

21:40.480 --> 21:41.460
This is what I'm teaching my daughters.

21:42.800 --> 21:46.300
And let me just say this too, since we're on the subject, okay?

21:48.140 --> 21:51.960
You know, I love the fact that people are, you know,

21:52.100 --> 21:53.840
they date and, you know,

21:54.000 --> 21:55.740
so many people have gotten married in our church

21:55.740 --> 21:56.560
and it's awesome.

21:57.060 --> 21:58.140
But let me just say this,

21:58.140 --> 22:00.780
is that marriage is a major commitment.

22:01.800 --> 22:03.500
It's like one of the biggest commitments.

22:04.260 --> 22:05.760
I would say even you just, like,

22:05.860 --> 22:09.040
one of the biggest events after salvation, right?

22:09.500 --> 22:10.340
It's a major commitment.

22:10.520 --> 22:11.100
It's a major thing.

22:11.460 --> 22:13.540
So, you know, take your time trying to figure out

22:13.540 --> 22:15.200
who you're going to marry, okay?

22:15.620 --> 22:18.760
Don't get caught up in the spirit

22:18.760 --> 22:20.240
and be like, this is the one

22:20.240 --> 22:22.900
and just get married tomorrow, okay?

22:24.040 --> 22:25.220
You know, a lot of times people are like,

22:25.280 --> 22:27.040
well, I believe this is the one.

22:27.040 --> 22:29.280
We're going to get married, you know,

22:29.340 --> 22:31.300
in about an hour or something like that.

22:32.980 --> 22:33.860
And you know what?

22:33.900 --> 22:35.020
It may seem like a good idea

22:35.020 --> 22:37.500
because you're just in love, you know?

22:38.100 --> 22:39.940
You're just, you just love this person.

22:40.080 --> 22:41.340
You're just absolutely in love.

22:41.660 --> 22:42.740
This is the one.

22:43.080 --> 22:45.040
She believes the reprobate doctrine.

22:46.520 --> 22:48.780
She hits post-trip, pre-rath.

22:49.380 --> 22:50.640
She's got all the boxes.

22:50.820 --> 22:53.200
She's a soul winner and all these things

22:53.200 --> 22:54.180
and you think everything's great

22:54.180 --> 22:55.220
and look, that is great.

22:55.800 --> 22:57.280
But I'm just telling you right now,

22:57.480 --> 22:59.680
listen to me, okay?

23:00.100 --> 23:01.060
Take your time though

23:02.240 --> 23:03.700
because that stuff wears off

23:04.080 --> 23:04.940
and then when you get married

23:04.940 --> 23:06.920
then you realize like, actually this person sucks.

23:09.480 --> 23:12.000
Like, man, like, I don't even care

23:12.000 --> 23:13.820
that she believes the reprobate doctrine anymore.

23:15.640 --> 23:17.100
Like, this is terrible.

23:18.500 --> 23:20.220
My life is a living hell right now.

23:20.580 --> 23:21.240
And you know what?

23:21.360 --> 23:22.040
Let me just tell you this.

23:22.200 --> 23:23.800
After that, it's too late.

23:24.860 --> 23:26.620
Because it's still death through us part.

23:28.140 --> 23:29.820
So you better keep that zeal.

23:31.020 --> 23:31.560
And you know what?

23:31.620 --> 23:32.840
You made a covenant before the Lord.

23:33.240 --> 23:36.500
Well, you know, I didn't see all the red flags.

23:36.780 --> 23:37.520
That's your fault.

23:38.520 --> 23:39.900
You didn't see all the red flags.

23:40.820 --> 23:43.080
You're too busy just...

23:44.720 --> 23:45.900
You weren't paying attention

23:46.340 --> 23:47.340
and now all of a sudden

23:47.340 --> 23:48.580
because the honeymoon's over

23:48.580 --> 23:49.900
now you're like, yeah,

23:49.960 --> 23:51.300
but I didn't really know the person.

23:51.400 --> 23:52.140
Who's fault is that?

23:53.440 --> 23:54.660
Who's fault is that?

23:55.660 --> 23:56.420
You know, and look,

23:56.600 --> 23:59.780
I'm not for elongated engagements either though.

24:00.220 --> 24:00.460
Okay?

24:01.600 --> 24:03.280
I'm not for the seven year

24:04.040 --> 24:05.560
pre-tribulation, tribulation,

24:05.760 --> 24:06.860
Daniel's 70th week either.

24:07.600 --> 24:07.880
Okay?

24:08.600 --> 24:10.100
I'm not for the three and a half years

24:10.100 --> 24:12.000
of tribulation, three and a half years of wrath.

24:12.560 --> 24:13.820
I'm not for that at all.

24:14.300 --> 24:14.540
Okay?

24:15.320 --> 24:16.480
I think that, you know,

24:16.580 --> 24:18.320
in my opinion, you know,

24:18.640 --> 24:20.340
when you feel you found the right one

24:20.340 --> 24:22.500
or whatever, you should get engaged

24:22.500 --> 24:25.380
within maybe five months or so,

24:25.500 --> 24:27.280
six months, and then, you know,

24:27.520 --> 24:29.660
maybe four to six months thereafter,

24:29.840 --> 24:30.400
then get married.

24:30.960 --> 24:31.140
Okay?

24:31.680 --> 24:32.380
Like about a year.

24:32.520 --> 24:34.000
This thing should take about a year or so.

24:34.280 --> 24:35.980
But not like two months though.

24:37.600 --> 24:38.000
Okay?

24:39.160 --> 24:40.220
And you say why?

24:40.340 --> 24:41.820
Because, you know, you got the...

24:41.820 --> 24:44.420
you got the spiritual adrenaline right now

24:44.420 --> 24:45.740
of being in a relationship.

24:47.260 --> 24:48.400
And I know a lot of people

24:48.400 --> 24:49.180
are not going to listen to me

24:49.180 --> 24:50.160
in this regard, and that's okay.

24:50.360 --> 24:52.540
You'll come to me, like, six months down the road

24:52.540 --> 24:53.640
when everything's falling apart

24:54.020 --> 24:55.560
and you regret making the decision,

24:55.800 --> 24:57.020
then I'll help you pick up the pieces.

24:57.580 --> 24:58.000
That's fine.

24:58.660 --> 24:59.320
I'm just telling you,

25:00.000 --> 25:01.520
don't act like I didn't tell you though.

25:02.720 --> 25:02.960
Okay?

25:03.440 --> 25:04.540
And look, I understand you're like,

25:04.640 --> 25:06.140
well, you know, time is flying by,

25:06.680 --> 25:07.780
and, you know, I'm just getting...

25:07.780 --> 25:08.740
I'm not getting any younger.

25:09.500 --> 25:10.760
You know, I'm only getting uglier.

25:11.340 --> 25:13.520
I'm just, you know, I just...

25:13.520 --> 25:14.000
I get it.

25:15.560 --> 25:16.340
I get it.

25:16.920 --> 25:17.200
Okay?

25:18.340 --> 25:20.300
However, I still don't think

25:20.300 --> 25:21.000
that's a good idea

25:21.000 --> 25:24.160
for you to just jump into a marriage

25:24.160 --> 25:26.500
right away and get married

25:26.500 --> 25:28.740
within a week's span, you know.

25:29.120 --> 25:30.700
And look, if you get married

25:30.700 --> 25:31.380
within a week's span,

25:31.520 --> 25:33.680
let's just have an exaggerated timeline, right?

25:33.780 --> 25:34.940
You get married within a week's span.

25:35.380 --> 25:36.720
You get married within a month's span.

25:37.480 --> 25:38.080
Praise God.

25:38.240 --> 25:39.060
You know, God is pleased with you

25:39.060 --> 25:40.080
because you got married, amen.

25:41.140 --> 25:42.080
And it's going to be great.

25:43.120 --> 25:44.680
It's going to be great the first couple of weeks.

25:46.140 --> 25:46.760
It is.

25:46.880 --> 25:47.420
It's going to be awesome.

25:48.360 --> 25:48.940
You know, you get married.

25:49.180 --> 25:50.860
You're just like, man, this is wonderful.

25:51.840 --> 25:54.160
And, you know, she makes me breakfast.

25:55.840 --> 25:57.300
And everything's just great.

25:57.800 --> 26:00.080
And then after like a month or two months,

26:00.160 --> 26:01.680
then you start realizing, like...

26:08.060 --> 26:08.660
That's weird.

26:09.840 --> 26:13.120
You know, then...

26:13.120 --> 26:14.260
Or after the honeymoon,

26:14.260 --> 26:16.140
she's just like...

26:20.740 --> 26:21.700
She's like...

26:22.440 --> 26:24.180
You're like, who the hell are you?

26:27.400 --> 26:28.820
I have an intruder in my home!

26:30.480 --> 26:33.720
You know, she takes the tape off her eyelids

26:33.720 --> 26:34.920
if she's Asian or something.

26:35.240 --> 26:37.820
You know, just all of this

26:38.840 --> 26:40.340
fake stuff comes off.

26:41.060 --> 26:41.080
Okay?

26:41.320 --> 26:42.160
Or, you know, for the girl.

26:42.540 --> 26:44.060
You know, you guys are on your honeymoon.

26:44.060 --> 26:44.860
He takes off his shoes.

26:45.000 --> 26:46.020
And then he's like, a lot shorter.

26:48.380 --> 26:49.460
He's like super tall.

26:49.580 --> 26:49.900
And he takes off.

26:49.980 --> 26:51.060
He's just like...

26:52.280 --> 26:53.840
They're like, oh, dude, I got a short cane.

26:55.580 --> 26:57.220
He's been wearing platforms the entire time.

26:57.480 --> 26:58.880
He's only been standing on

26:58.880 --> 27:01.240
the highest of places in the room

27:01.240 --> 27:02.080
when I talk to him.

27:03.060 --> 27:05.180
He's been height-maxing this entire time.

27:07.560 --> 27:08.500
He reaches in.

27:08.580 --> 27:10.380
He just removes the fake muscle

27:10.380 --> 27:11.680
from his biceps and shoulder,

27:11.680 --> 27:12.940
the pads and everything.

27:13.520 --> 27:16.380
And you're like, I can't believe this, you know?

27:18.680 --> 27:19.680
It wears off.

27:19.980 --> 27:20.600
It wears off.

27:21.380 --> 27:22.580
And then you know what's going to happen?

27:22.880 --> 27:24.540
Then you're going to start coming up with reasons

27:24.540 --> 27:25.920
why you need to get divorced.

27:26.900 --> 27:28.580
Oh, you know, it's just not...

27:28.580 --> 27:29.840
I don't think it's God's will.

27:30.100 --> 27:32.200
He's so abusive with his words.

27:33.600 --> 27:35.200
You're abusive with your looks.

27:41.150 --> 27:42.710
We need to have a society

27:42.710 --> 27:45.010
that promotes staying together no matter what.

27:45.840 --> 27:46.130
Okay?

27:47.030 --> 27:47.890
And you know what?

27:47.890 --> 27:50.650
What irks me is when people are just...

27:50.650 --> 27:52.210
They're so in.

27:52.790 --> 27:55.210
They're all in to get married overnight,

27:55.550 --> 27:57.850
but they don't necessarily carry over

27:57.850 --> 27:59.130
that same conviction,

27:59.650 --> 28:02.270
that same zeal a year down the road.

28:03.350 --> 28:05.070
Five years down the road.

28:05.850 --> 28:07.130
Now look, obviously there's instances

28:07.130 --> 28:08.330
where people get married overnight

28:08.330 --> 28:09.230
and it does work out.

28:09.990 --> 28:11.370
And praise God for that.

28:12.110 --> 28:12.430
Okay?

28:12.610 --> 28:13.990
I want everybody who gets married

28:13.990 --> 28:14.490
to just work.

28:14.590 --> 28:15.650
No matter how long it takes

28:15.650 --> 28:16.470
or how short it was,

28:16.990 --> 28:18.270
I wanted to just work out

28:18.270 --> 28:19.770
and for them to be married,

28:20.550 --> 28:22.130
you know, till death do them part

28:22.130 --> 28:23.310
and so forth, you know.

28:23.890 --> 28:24.750
And praise God.

28:24.890 --> 28:25.550
But here's the thing.

28:25.630 --> 28:26.710
Do you really want to gamble though?

28:27.190 --> 28:28.990
You want to throw the dice on that?

28:29.410 --> 28:30.350
You think that's going to be you?

28:30.770 --> 28:31.690
It's better to just wait.

28:32.730 --> 28:33.650
You know, date,

28:34.210 --> 28:35.410
get to know each other,

28:36.430 --> 28:38.130
make sure that you're as compatible

28:38.130 --> 28:39.050
as you can be,

28:39.770 --> 28:41.790
and then, you know, tie the knot.

28:41.790 --> 28:43.910
So, you know,

28:44.270 --> 28:46.050
don't come at me with this like,

28:46.150 --> 28:46.830
oh, you know,

28:47.270 --> 28:47.770
I'm in love.

28:47.850 --> 28:48.610
I'm going to get married tomorrow.

28:49.230 --> 28:49.690
All right.

28:51.890 --> 28:53.130
And by the way, don't do this.

28:53.250 --> 28:54.870
Don't say I'm going to get married next week.

28:55.310 --> 28:56.690
Can I get some advice on what?

28:56.810 --> 28:57.550
You already made the decision.

29:01.350 --> 29:01.670
Why?

29:01.990 --> 29:03.570
And I'm just telling you right now,

29:03.630 --> 29:04.210
people do this.

29:05.490 --> 29:06.310
People come to me.

29:06.550 --> 29:06.930
Listen to me.

29:07.210 --> 29:08.630
People come to me for advice

29:08.630 --> 29:10.310
on what to do on how to get married.

29:10.310 --> 29:11.850
I'll give them the advice.

29:12.230 --> 29:12.950
They'll agree

29:12.950 --> 29:15.370
and just literally do the exact opposite.

29:17.510 --> 29:19.070
It happens all the time.

29:20.630 --> 29:22.390
Well, people, literally this year,

29:23.090 --> 29:23.990
I've gone through it like,

29:24.090 --> 29:24.770
hey, what do you think about it?

29:24.770 --> 29:25.250
And I was like, well,

29:25.310 --> 29:26.710
and I give them the advice

29:26.710 --> 29:27.610
that I'm giving right now.

29:27.990 --> 29:29.090
You should wait a little bit.

29:29.610 --> 29:31.030
You know, you don't really know this person.

29:31.370 --> 29:32.510
Get to know them.

29:33.110 --> 29:35.230
You know, just trust me.

29:35.290 --> 29:36.550
He's like, oh, yeah, you're right.

29:36.830 --> 29:38.850
And then I find out they're just,

29:38.850 --> 29:39.630
they're about to get married.

29:39.750 --> 29:40.210
I'm like, all right.

29:41.430 --> 29:42.630
And it's not because they told me,

29:42.710 --> 29:43.870
it's because another pastor told me.

29:44.390 --> 29:45.930
I just found out like second hand.

29:47.030 --> 29:49.770
Now, look, I just hope it works out.

29:50.190 --> 29:51.530
I wanted to work out, amen.

29:52.950 --> 29:54.270
But do me a favor though.

29:54.630 --> 29:55.570
Don't come talk to me though.

29:56.070 --> 29:57.070
Ask me for advice

29:57.530 --> 29:58.690
if you've already predetermined

29:58.690 --> 29:59.310
what you're going to do.

30:00.210 --> 30:01.510
Because what that shows me is

30:01.510 --> 30:02.410
that you're just hoping,

30:02.710 --> 30:03.850
you were coming to me hoping

30:03.850 --> 30:04.470
that I would tell you

30:04.470 --> 30:05.330
what you want to hear.

30:06.230 --> 30:07.210
And because I didn't,

30:07.210 --> 30:08.810
then you're just not going to follow through on it.

30:09.270 --> 30:11.130
I'm not interested in counseling people

30:11.950 --> 30:13.650
with advice and giving counsel

30:13.650 --> 30:15.790
and having you just lie to my face

30:15.790 --> 30:17.330
and not follow through on that counsel.

30:19.930 --> 30:20.970
And you know, like,

30:21.050 --> 30:21.750
well, who are you to talk?

30:21.950 --> 30:22.730
Well, how about the fact

30:22.730 --> 30:23.650
that I'm happily married?

30:25.530 --> 30:26.530
Okay, how about the fact

30:26.530 --> 30:27.970
that I've been happily married?

30:28.150 --> 30:28.970
I have six kids.

30:29.230 --> 30:30.410
I'm the pastor of the church.

30:30.710 --> 30:32.350
You know, I'm endowed with wisdom.

30:32.890 --> 30:34.190
You know, I have the anointing

30:34.190 --> 30:34.950
and the unction.

30:35.230 --> 30:36.690
I have your best interest in mine.

30:36.690 --> 30:38.370
I don't want to make your life miserable.

30:38.830 --> 30:39.510
And how about the fact

30:39.510 --> 30:40.910
that I've just seen many stories

30:40.910 --> 30:42.150
where it just doesn't work out

30:42.150 --> 30:42.930
and I'm trying to use

30:42.930 --> 30:45.150
that accumulative experience

30:45.150 --> 30:47.790
to help you to avoid destruction?

30:50.030 --> 30:51.650
You're like, yeah, but I'm so chopped.

30:51.830 --> 30:52.690
I don't even know if this is,

30:53.070 --> 30:54.530
you know, if I'm ever going to find anybody.

30:55.190 --> 30:57.470
You know, don't worry about that.

30:58.350 --> 30:59.590
Don't worry about that.

31:00.070 --> 31:01.910
You know, if you're chopped.

31:02.930 --> 31:03.250
Okay?

31:04.350 --> 31:07.590
You know, I knew someone was going to say,

31:07.910 --> 31:09.090
you know, if you're chopped,

31:09.250 --> 31:09.750
don't worry about it.

31:09.810 --> 31:10.770
God's hand is on you.

31:11.430 --> 31:12.930
And look, let me say this.

31:13.270 --> 31:14.270
If you feel like you're chopped,

31:14.410 --> 31:15.110
then you better make sure

31:15.110 --> 31:16.050
that God's hand is on you.

31:18.010 --> 31:18.910
I mean, you should make sure

31:18.910 --> 31:19.970
that God's hand is on you, period.

31:21.010 --> 31:22.050
But especially if you feel

31:22.050 --> 31:22.850
like you're just chopped,

31:22.990 --> 31:23.890
you're just super ugly,

31:24.110 --> 31:24.670
you just don't think

31:24.670 --> 31:25.710
you're ever going to find anybody.

31:26.250 --> 31:27.230
Okay, you better make sure

31:27.230 --> 31:27.950
you fill with the spirit.

31:29.370 --> 31:30.370
Because the Bible says

31:30.370 --> 31:31.130
that a prudent wife

31:31.130 --> 31:32.350
is of the Lord, right?

31:32.810 --> 31:34.130
He's the one that provides that.

31:35.170 --> 31:36.310
And so, you know,

31:36.550 --> 31:37.350
don't approach this

31:37.350 --> 31:38.310
in a carnal manner either.

31:38.850 --> 31:40.830
You know, and I do think it's important.

31:41.010 --> 31:42.490
We'll get to the story in just a bit.

31:43.070 --> 31:44.710
You know, I'll finish off in just a bit.

31:45.110 --> 31:46.850
But this is important though.

31:46.950 --> 31:48.350
I do need to talk about this, okay?

31:49.230 --> 31:49.790
Listen to me.

31:50.270 --> 31:51.410
You know, it's important

31:51.410 --> 31:53.050
for you to work on yourself spiritually, too.

31:54.670 --> 31:56.030
You know, I'm all for

31:56.030 --> 31:57.110
people getting married young.

31:57.870 --> 31:58.150
Okay?

31:58.650 --> 32:00.010
I want my kids to get married young.

32:00.370 --> 32:01.230
Not too young.

32:02.030 --> 32:03.870
I'm not talking about like 17 years of age

32:03.870 --> 32:04.570
or something like that.

32:04.750 --> 32:05.990
I'm not talking about like frontier,

32:06.710 --> 32:09.610
you know, American colony status,

32:10.030 --> 32:12.030
you know, 17 years of age.

32:12.190 --> 32:12.970
Just keep in mind, they died

32:12.970 --> 32:14.130
like at 30, by the way, you know?

32:14.710 --> 32:15.530
I'm talking about, you know,

32:15.610 --> 32:17.530
maybe 20 years of age,

32:18.830 --> 32:19.470
possibly 19,

32:19.730 --> 32:21.030
don't get any ideas, boys, you know?

32:21.370 --> 32:21.950
But who knows?

32:22.230 --> 32:23.870
Maybe they mature in such a way

32:23.870 --> 32:25.390
that at 19, they're just ready to go.

32:25.750 --> 32:26.890
And look, I'm all for it

32:26.890 --> 32:28.590
because then it's just like grandkids.

32:28.750 --> 32:29.570
You know, I want to see

32:29.570 --> 32:30.270
some grandkids, amen.

32:31.310 --> 32:33.510
But let me say this though, you know,

32:33.910 --> 32:35.910
take advantage of your singleness

32:35.910 --> 32:38.310
to just like grow yourself.

32:40.510 --> 32:42.850
Spiritually, emotionally, mentally.

32:43.890 --> 32:45.210
And you say to yourself,

32:45.470 --> 32:46.990
I feel like relationships haven't worked,

32:47.170 --> 32:48.290
then work on yourself then.

32:49.710 --> 32:51.770
Maybe God hasn't allowed relationships

32:51.770 --> 32:52.630
to work for you,

32:52.790 --> 32:53.910
and it's for your benefit.

32:55.070 --> 32:56.750
Because what if you just entered

32:56.750 --> 32:58.890
into that relationship just completely immature

32:58.890 --> 33:00.850
and you just become the burden

33:00.850 --> 33:02.150
on that relationship

33:02.150 --> 33:03.730
because of your lack of spiritual maturity?

33:04.830 --> 33:05.490
You know?

33:05.850 --> 33:07.470
And you might be the bullet

33:07.470 --> 33:08.650
that that person dodged.

33:09.570 --> 33:10.290
That's true.

33:11.470 --> 33:12.590
But here's the thing.

33:12.970 --> 33:14.470
Why don't you just grow in the Lord,

33:14.990 --> 33:15.730
read your Bible,

33:16.190 --> 33:17.510
become a godly person,

33:18.050 --> 33:20.110
learn how to have God's favor on your life,

33:20.450 --> 33:21.830
learn how to mature spiritually,

33:21.990 --> 33:23.990
mentally, physically, work a job,

33:24.090 --> 33:24.950
be a blessing at your church.

33:25.330 --> 33:26.090
Look, you know,

33:26.150 --> 33:27.410
they used to say this in the old IFB,

33:27.410 --> 33:28.590
and I agree with that 100%.

33:28.590 --> 33:30.070
The man who walks with God

33:30.070 --> 33:31.510
always reaches his destination.

33:32.810 --> 33:33.590
So walk with God.

33:34.470 --> 33:35.070
Read the Bible.

33:35.450 --> 33:36.390
Serve in your church.

33:36.890 --> 33:37.750
Pray unto the Lord.

33:38.190 --> 33:39.310
And I'm just telling you right now,

33:39.650 --> 33:41.530
it doesn't matter how many things

33:41.530 --> 33:42.730
you have stacked against you.

33:42.830 --> 33:43.530
If God is with you,

33:43.570 --> 33:44.750
who can be against you, amen?

33:46.350 --> 33:48.110
You know, when I was at my old church,

33:48.550 --> 33:50.530
I had a lot of things stacked against me.

33:50.630 --> 33:51.830
People stacked against me.

33:52.630 --> 33:53.850
I mean, there's people who were literally,

33:54.030 --> 33:55.330
there's assistant pastors

33:55.790 --> 33:57.830
who were trying to discourage my wife's family

33:57.830 --> 33:59.290
from allowing her to marry me.

33:59.910 --> 34:00.650
Just as I was like,

34:00.690 --> 34:01.890
I don't think this is a good idea.

34:02.410 --> 34:04.150
And I'm thinking to myself like,

34:04.850 --> 34:05.810
mind your business?

34:07.350 --> 34:08.230
What is this?

34:08.630 --> 34:11.410
People, church members, just haters, you know?

34:11.630 --> 34:12.570
Just people who were envious.

34:12.990 --> 34:13.530
They were haters.

34:13.990 --> 34:15.470
They didn't like the fact that this guy

34:15.470 --> 34:17.770
who got saved at 21 years of age,

34:17.930 --> 34:19.650
you know, is being considered

34:19.650 --> 34:21.210
by the pastor to marry his daughter.

34:21.570 --> 34:23.170
So they're trying to throw salt on the game.

34:23.990 --> 34:25.970
You know, trying to make me look bad or whatever.

34:26.490 --> 34:28.230
And from a practical perspective,

34:28.370 --> 34:29.470
I would think that they would have won

34:29.470 --> 34:31.170
if I didn't have God's favor on my life.

34:32.110 --> 34:33.290
But obviously, you know,

34:33.410 --> 34:35.110
the heart of the king is in the hand of the Lord, amen.

34:36.290 --> 34:38.130
And so like, I knew I didn't have favor

34:38.130 --> 34:39.030
with a whole lot of people,

34:39.110 --> 34:40.290
so I guess I just had to make sure

34:40.290 --> 34:41.250
that I had favor with God.

34:42.090 --> 34:43.470
I had to make sure that I read my Bible.

34:43.630 --> 34:45.310
I had to make sure that I was a virtuous person.

34:45.790 --> 34:48.150
I had to make sure that I was serving the Lord

34:48.150 --> 34:49.090
and I had the purest motives

34:49.090 --> 34:51.110
and that I would pray into God with importunity.

34:51.510 --> 34:52.110
And you know what?

34:52.110 --> 34:53.830
Here I am six kids later.

34:55.710 --> 34:58.070
And so obviously God favored me.

34:58.530 --> 34:59.550
His hand was upon me.

34:59.910 --> 35:00.270
But you know what?

35:00.350 --> 35:02.950
During that the tribulation period,

35:04.350 --> 35:06.070
during Daniel's 70th week,

35:07.490 --> 35:09.450
when the Antichrist was out to get me,

35:11.410 --> 35:13.110
during that particular time,

35:14.290 --> 35:15.470
I didn't waste that time.

35:17.050 --> 35:17.990
He said, what did you do?

35:18.210 --> 35:20.710
Memorized Scripture, read the Bible a lot,

35:21.370 --> 35:22.030
prayed a lot.

35:22.230 --> 35:24.630
Hey, there was times during that particular era

35:24.630 --> 35:25.910
where I was just alone.

35:26.990 --> 35:27.150
You know?

35:27.590 --> 35:28.950
Like I didn't have church members with me.

35:29.130 --> 35:32.410
I remember spending Christmas alone, Thanksgiving alone,

35:32.530 --> 35:33.950
just by myself in my dorm room.

35:34.210 --> 35:35.290
I didn't have anybody with me.

35:35.630 --> 35:36.350
And you know what I did?

35:36.450 --> 35:37.410
Instead of throwing a pity party,

35:37.890 --> 35:41.010
just prayed unto the Lord, rejoiced unto the Lord,

35:41.430 --> 35:42.250
read my Bible,

35:42.650 --> 35:45.230
make sure I was gaining favor with God.

35:46.270 --> 35:47.130
Because that's all I had.

35:48.070 --> 35:48.750
And you know what?

35:48.750 --> 35:50.190
That's all you really need, right?

35:51.270 --> 35:52.070
Favor with God.

35:52.730 --> 35:53.350
And you know what?

35:53.690 --> 35:57.050
Now I got like a ton of people here that love me.

35:57.550 --> 36:01.130
I got my family, my kids, all types of people.

36:01.510 --> 36:03.230
I got pastor friends.

36:03.550 --> 36:05.550
I got people in other churches that love me.

36:05.830 --> 36:06.290
It's great.

36:07.230 --> 36:08.770
But it's because I took advantage

36:08.770 --> 36:11.450
during that particular era to grow myself

36:11.450 --> 36:13.410
and not throw a pity party,

36:13.710 --> 36:15.730
but make sure I'm reading the Word of God.

36:15.930 --> 36:16.930
I'm praying unto the Lord.

36:16.930 --> 36:19.010
I'm learning how to get prayers answered, amen?

36:20.390 --> 36:23.270
So, you know, you need to make sure, young man, young lady,

36:23.650 --> 36:25.530
that you think things through.

36:26.350 --> 36:28.250
And don't be hasty in your decision.

36:28.610 --> 36:30.510
You're like, yeah, but I'm nearing that time, though,

36:30.850 --> 36:33.250
when I'm like about to be an uncle.

36:33.390 --> 36:34.570
No, you're already a nun.

36:35.570 --> 36:37.790
You're not near the time that you're there.

36:39.570 --> 36:40.730
But it doesn't really matter.

36:41.590 --> 36:42.350
Because you know what?

36:42.410 --> 36:44.170
With God's favor, you know,

36:44.370 --> 36:45.550
God can perform miracles, amen.

36:47.370 --> 36:49.030
He can perform miracles.

36:49.550 --> 36:51.170
But let me say this, men,

36:51.790 --> 36:52.570
don't go see the,

36:52.850 --> 36:54.890
don't go check out the daughters of the land, though.

36:55.890 --> 36:56.810
Just because you feel like

36:56.810 --> 36:58.470
you're not going to get anything in Israel or something.

36:59.050 --> 37:00.290
You're like, oh, I just need to go see

37:00.290 --> 37:01.470
the daughters of the land.

37:01.610 --> 37:03.490
I need to go check out Instagram or something

37:03.490 --> 37:06.050
and see if I can get just some unsafe girl

37:06.050 --> 37:10.130
to mold her into what you're asking for problems.

37:10.750 --> 37:11.490
Because the Bible tells us

37:11.490 --> 37:13.750
not to be unequally yoked together with unbelievers.

37:14.630 --> 37:14.990
Okay.

37:16.570 --> 37:18.850
And so that was a rabbit that needed to be chased.

37:19.590 --> 37:21.610
But, you know, I need to mention this from time to time.

37:22.270 --> 37:24.890
And look, you know, if you are a young man,

37:25.110 --> 37:26.670
a young lady, and you want to get married,

37:26.830 --> 37:29.470
I want to cultivate that desire in you.

37:29.510 --> 37:30.610
I want you to be married, too.

37:31.430 --> 37:33.890
I think it's awesome when people get married in a church.

37:34.030 --> 37:35.750
I think it's awesome when young people, you know,

37:35.830 --> 37:38.330
are considering marriage when young people out there aren't.

37:39.290 --> 37:40.810
It says a lot about you, right?

37:41.670 --> 37:43.790
I'm just trying to help you to avoid destruction.

37:45.250 --> 37:46.590
Because I'm just telling you right now,

37:46.790 --> 37:48.850
you know, not everyone lives happily ever after.

37:49.890 --> 37:50.710
That's the fact.

37:51.230 --> 37:52.310
Let me give you the harsh reality.

37:52.790 --> 37:56.090
Not everyone rides off into the sunset, okay?

37:56.590 --> 37:58.090
And, you know, thankfully there's people who are,

37:58.490 --> 38:00.510
you know, they're riding, it's not into the sunset,

38:00.830 --> 38:01.910
and it's really hard for them,

38:01.950 --> 38:04.270
but they're riding to the very end.

38:05.190 --> 38:05.530
You know?

38:05.830 --> 38:08.190
Maybe the marriage is not what they want it to be,

38:08.190 --> 38:10.670
but they're sticking it out, and praise God for them.

38:11.030 --> 38:13.790
I'm just trying to help you to avoid, you know,

38:13.870 --> 38:16.810
and I'm sure they would agree with me to avoid that.

38:17.730 --> 38:20.270
They would tell you like, yeah, listen to that.

38:20.610 --> 38:21.430
Don't feel bad for me.

38:22.150 --> 38:23.230
Just listen to that.

38:23.770 --> 38:25.250
And make sure you handle it the right way,

38:25.270 --> 38:26.410
because I'm telling you right now,

38:26.830 --> 38:28.870
it could end horribly, okay?

38:29.970 --> 38:31.410
And so, that's important.

38:32.370 --> 38:33.610
Look at verse 5 here.

38:34.570 --> 38:35.470
Or verse 4 says,

38:38.830 --> 38:43.410
And Jacob heard that he had defiled Dinah, his daughter.

38:43.650 --> 38:45.650
Now his sons were with his cattle in the field,

38:45.750 --> 38:47.970
and Jacob held this peace until they were come.

38:48.370 --> 38:49.590
And Hamor, the father of Shechem,

38:49.850 --> 38:52.010
went out unto Jacob to commune with him.

38:52.230 --> 38:54.130
And the sons of Jacob came out of the field

38:54.130 --> 38:56.270
when they heard it, and the men were grieved.

38:56.670 --> 39:00.010
And they were very wroth because he had wroth folly in Israel

39:00.010 --> 39:01.570
in line with Jacob's daughter.

39:01.950 --> 39:03.210
Which thing ought not to be done?

39:03.290 --> 39:04.010
Now let me say one more thing

39:04.010 --> 39:05.470
before we get into this actual text.

39:05.990 --> 39:08.590
Because obviously, we're going to have young people here

39:08.590 --> 39:09.730
who don't have parents,

39:10.890 --> 39:12.650
they don't necessarily have someone

39:12.650 --> 39:14.170
guiding them through those steps, right?

39:15.330 --> 39:17.210
Now, my recommendation to you is

39:17.210 --> 39:18.610
that you don't just become this ronin

39:18.610 --> 39:20.450
and just try to figure things out on your own.

39:21.610 --> 39:23.030
Because that could be bad too.

39:23.810 --> 39:27.130
Or you might have parents that are not in church.

39:27.390 --> 39:28.030
Maybe they're Christians.

39:28.230 --> 39:29.070
They're not fully committed.

39:29.210 --> 39:29.970
They don't come to church.

39:30.230 --> 39:32.230
And they're just kind of really lenient with you.

39:32.730 --> 39:34.090
You know, don't be the type of person

39:34.090 --> 39:35.410
who just takes full advantage of that

39:35.410 --> 39:36.550
to just do whatever you want.

39:37.310 --> 39:38.450
Be a person of wisdom

39:38.450 --> 39:39.750
and go to people of wisdom.

39:41.210 --> 39:43.230
Go, you can come to me as your pastor.

39:43.390 --> 39:44.410
You go to your team leader

39:44.410 --> 39:46.470
if they're mature in that particular area

39:47.070 --> 39:49.490
and say, hey, I would like some,

39:49.850 --> 39:51.310
just I want to pick your brain.

39:52.090 --> 39:53.950
You know, I want to get your take on this.

39:54.690 --> 39:55.050
Okay?

39:55.570 --> 39:57.010
You know, this is the situation I'm in.

39:57.110 --> 39:58.250
What would you recommend that I do?

39:58.650 --> 39:58.990
You know?

40:00.070 --> 40:01.650
And if you're the type of person

40:01.650 --> 40:03.190
who just doesn't want to follow through with that,

40:03.290 --> 40:06.370
with that, you know, advice that it's given to you,

40:06.450 --> 40:07.090
then this is what you say.

40:07.370 --> 40:09.250
You say, you know, I don't 100% agree,

40:09.290 --> 40:10.230
but I really appreciate it

40:10.230 --> 40:12.090
and I'm really just trying to figure out what to do.

40:12.450 --> 40:14.530
And so I'm not fully convinced

40:14.530 --> 40:15.570
on anything right now.

40:16.090 --> 40:16.650
You know what I mean?

40:16.830 --> 40:19.370
And so I'm definitely going to take it into consideration.

40:20.490 --> 40:21.670
But at the end of the day,

40:21.790 --> 40:22.830
if you're going to come to me though,

40:23.650 --> 40:26.130
okay, I'm going to give you sound advice,

40:27.390 --> 40:29.150
okay, based on a lot of experience.

40:29.150 --> 40:31.290
But go to people of experience to get that.

40:31.870 --> 40:33.830
And you know, that's like the safest way

40:33.830 --> 40:35.010
to go about these situations.

40:35.470 --> 40:35.750
Okay?

40:36.590 --> 40:39.310
And you know, I don't like playing cupid.

40:40.450 --> 40:40.730
Okay?

40:41.330 --> 40:43.210
I'm not the type to just, you know, like,

40:43.670 --> 40:45.250
you know, let's get these people together,

40:45.850 --> 40:47.390
these people together or whatever.

40:48.050 --> 40:49.050
You know, but you know,

40:49.150 --> 40:50.970
I can kind of guide you in the right direction though,

40:51.050 --> 40:51.650
if you want.

40:52.510 --> 40:54.450
I don't like being involved

40:54.450 --> 40:55.530
in other people's drama

40:56.070 --> 40:57.650
and what they're doing or whatever.

40:57.650 --> 40:59.150
But if you come to me and you're just like,

40:59.150 --> 41:00.750
I don't really have anybody else to go to,

41:01.150 --> 41:03.070
can you advise me in what direction to go to?

41:03.410 --> 41:05.110
You know, I am going to have your best interest in mind

41:05.110 --> 41:06.330
and I'm going to say, yeah, that's a good idea.

41:06.590 --> 41:08.670
I'm not going to tell you what to do in that particular area.

41:08.710 --> 41:11.870
But this is what I would recommend for you to do.

41:12.430 --> 41:12.450
Okay?

41:13.110 --> 41:15.030
And so find godly leaders,

41:15.230 --> 41:17.210
find godly people that you can confide in

41:17.210 --> 41:18.470
and so forth.

41:18.870 --> 41:20.750
So what we have here is obviously,

41:21.870 --> 41:24.030
Jacob's sons are very upset with

41:25.130 --> 41:27.410
what the son has done here with Dinah.

41:27.410 --> 41:28.910
And it says in verse 8,

41:29.170 --> 41:30.310
Hamor communed with them saying,

41:30.510 --> 41:31.750
the soul of my son Shechem,

41:32.010 --> 41:33.010
longest for your daughter,

41:33.610 --> 41:35.550
I pray you give her,

41:35.630 --> 41:36.650
him to wife.

41:37.090 --> 41:38.190
Now I will say this, okay?

41:39.090 --> 41:40.670
You know, there's two ways to go about

41:40.670 --> 41:41.710
this particular situation.

41:42.270 --> 41:43.850
Obviously, you know,

41:44.750 --> 41:46.790
there is already a tie here.

41:47.310 --> 41:47.510
Okay?

41:47.990 --> 41:48.590
And I want to be careful.

41:48.750 --> 41:49.690
I don't want you to misunderstand

41:49.690 --> 41:50.550
what I'm going to say.

41:50.910 --> 41:52.850
I believe it's wrong to marry unbelievers.

41:53.450 --> 41:54.930
100% of the time as a Christian.

41:55.530 --> 41:55.810
Okay?

41:55.810 --> 41:57.850
But you also have to take into account

41:57.850 --> 42:00.890
that if you allowed your son

42:00.890 --> 42:01.710
or your daughter,

42:03.370 --> 42:04.750
because of your leniency,

42:05.410 --> 42:07.410
to date someone who is an unbeliever

42:07.410 --> 42:09.690
and they get into a situation like this,

42:10.390 --> 42:11.710
you know, you have two people

42:11.710 --> 42:13.330
who are just deeply connected

42:13.950 --> 42:14.870
at this point.

42:15.470 --> 42:15.710
Okay?

42:16.350 --> 42:18.090
And you kind of run the risk

42:18.090 --> 42:20.150
if you decide to just tear them apart.

42:20.310 --> 42:21.130
And I'm talking about like

42:21.130 --> 42:22.450
they've already committed fornication,

42:23.250 --> 42:24.930
they've been involved in the situation,

42:24.930 --> 42:26.790
they have this tie one to another.

42:27.290 --> 42:27.970
They just, they're just,

42:28.350 --> 42:30.770
they have this commitment one toward one another.

42:31.190 --> 42:32.890
You run the risk of kind of like

42:33.870 --> 42:35.650
losing influence over your kids

42:35.650 --> 42:37.250
if you just say, don't do it at all.

42:37.750 --> 42:38.010
Okay?

42:38.550 --> 42:40.090
You're not, it's not going to happen.

42:40.710 --> 42:42.690
You know, obviously if you're the father

42:42.690 --> 42:44.070
and that's what you choose to do,

42:44.230 --> 42:45.330
I'm 100% for that.

42:45.790 --> 42:45.990
Okay?

42:46.410 --> 42:48.350
Just know that there's ramifications to that.

42:50.790 --> 42:52.930
Another avenue that you can explore,

42:53.470 --> 42:55.030
if something like this were to happen,

42:55.470 --> 42:56.730
and nothing like this is happening right now,

42:56.810 --> 42:57.470
but I'm going to tell you right now,

42:57.550 --> 42:58.430
it's going to happen in the future.

42:59.290 --> 43:00.490
Just the law of number says that.

43:01.850 --> 43:03.050
What you could do

43:03.810 --> 43:05.710
is just try to get Hamor's son saved.

43:07.310 --> 43:09.090
Because if Hamor's son is just so,

43:10.330 --> 43:12.330
just absolutely fixated

43:12.330 --> 43:13.750
on marrying the daughter,

43:14.250 --> 43:15.130
they've been together,

43:15.570 --> 43:16.910
it's going to cause a major problem,

43:17.210 --> 43:19.330
then one of the best things to do is just say,

43:19.370 --> 43:20.930
well, let's just try to win this guy to the Lord.

43:20.930 --> 43:23.750
Obviously, you know, I'm using this as an example here.

43:24.050 --> 43:25.350
Win this guy to the Lord,

43:25.970 --> 43:28.510
and yeah, you know, have them get married

43:28.510 --> 43:31.350
so that it doesn't cause problems thereafter.

43:32.290 --> 43:33.830
Because you may separate them

43:33.830 --> 43:34.850
and then you know what's going to happen

43:34.850 --> 43:36.410
is Diana's just going to sneak out again

43:36.410 --> 43:38.130
to go see her boyfriend.

43:39.010 --> 43:40.470
Because there's just a tie there.

43:41.050 --> 43:41.770
Now, look folks,

43:42.070 --> 43:43.630
the best thing to do is just,

43:43.830 --> 43:45.250
just stay out of check on me, man.

43:46.410 --> 43:48.210
Just avoid all of this altogether.

43:49.290 --> 43:51.370
But if you're already in this situation,

43:52.410 --> 43:53.870
you could do number one,

43:54.350 --> 43:55.390
know it's not happening,

43:55.570 --> 43:55.970
we're moving.

43:57.370 --> 43:58.970
And just like pack up the tent

43:58.970 --> 44:00.450
and go somewhere else

44:00.450 --> 44:02.630
and just get them completely away from each other.

44:03.130 --> 44:03.690
And you know what,

44:03.730 --> 44:04.770
if that's what you choose to do,

44:05.330 --> 44:06.630
then that's what you choose to do.

44:07.010 --> 44:08.110
Or you can say, well,

44:08.570 --> 44:09.930
you know, because I was so lenient

44:09.930 --> 44:10.730
and now they're just,

44:10.790 --> 44:12.030
there's this soul tie between,

44:12.390 --> 44:14.670
you know, my kid and this person.

44:15.110 --> 44:16.190
Well, you know,

44:16.190 --> 44:17.790
let's at least try to get them saved

44:18.210 --> 44:19.810
and you know, he seems to love her

44:19.810 --> 44:21.550
and so then we can let them marry

44:21.550 --> 44:23.390
and make the right decisions thereafter.

44:24.070 --> 44:24.890
And you know what,

44:25.710 --> 44:26.890
you don't have to do this,

44:26.990 --> 44:28.350
but I'm just going to tell you right now,

44:29.810 --> 44:32.690
that has greater results

44:33.350 --> 44:35.410
than the first one, long term.

44:36.430 --> 44:37.330
Because I'm telling you right now,

44:37.650 --> 44:41.050
the first one can often cause resentment

44:41.050 --> 44:42.770
and then, you know,

44:43.230 --> 44:45.230
they can even go elope or something like that.

44:45.230 --> 44:46.070
It's not right to do.

44:47.070 --> 44:48.870
Just disobey you, go elope.

44:49.450 --> 44:50.190
And then, you know,

44:50.350 --> 44:51.850
there's just division between you,

44:52.710 --> 44:54.330
between the parents and the child

44:54.330 --> 44:56.390
because of this whole situation, right?

44:57.530 --> 45:00.290
Or what you can do is get them saved,

45:00.830 --> 45:02.810
disciple him, work with him.

45:03.190 --> 45:03.950
They get married

45:03.950 --> 45:05.930
and now they're integrated into the family.

45:06.510 --> 45:09.310
You know, he can become a Christian.

45:10.150 --> 45:11.270
You know, you can influence him

45:11.270 --> 45:12.550
as best as you possibly can.

45:12.650 --> 45:13.690
He loves your daughter or whatever.

45:14.250 --> 45:15.650
And guess what happens thereafter?

45:16.130 --> 45:16.810
They have children

45:16.810 --> 45:18.690
and then years pass by

45:18.690 --> 45:19.890
and you can move on from that.

45:20.010 --> 45:21.850
But the relationship is still there.

45:22.430 --> 45:23.890
It's not the best outcome for sure.

45:24.290 --> 45:25.330
I'm just telling you right now,

45:25.550 --> 45:26.290
the best thing to do

45:26.290 --> 45:27.390
is just avoid this altogether.

45:27.910 --> 45:30.030
I'm just kind of giving you, you know,

45:30.530 --> 45:31.890
the worst possible case scenario

45:31.890 --> 45:33.250
and what to do if you're in that situation.

45:33.930 --> 45:34.170
Okay?

45:34.810 --> 45:36.170
And I know this is going in one ear

45:36.170 --> 45:37.730
and not the other for a lot of you,

45:38.130 --> 45:38.870
but, you know,

45:38.930 --> 45:40.050
maybe 20 years from now

45:40.050 --> 45:40.350
you're going to be like,

45:40.410 --> 45:41.690
hey, what was that one thing you said?

45:42.390 --> 45:42.750
You know?

45:42.750 --> 45:44.910
Because now it's like relevant to me or something.

45:45.390 --> 45:46.210
Hopefully not,

45:46.310 --> 45:47.390
but I'm just saying this is,

45:47.550 --> 45:49.550
it's a thing that happens sometimes.

45:50.290 --> 45:50.310
Okay?

45:51.330 --> 45:52.070
And so, you know,

45:52.230 --> 45:53.970
you have Jacob's sons

45:53.970 --> 45:56.710
coming up with this, you know,

45:56.890 --> 45:57.970
deceitful plan

45:58.750 --> 46:00.310
and they're basically saying like,

46:00.450 --> 46:02.190
hey, you know,

46:02.530 --> 46:03.890
you can have our sister

46:03.890 --> 46:05.590
and we'll marry in together or whatever,

46:05.710 --> 46:07.170
but you have to be circumcised.

46:07.470 --> 46:09.190
This is the condition that you have.

46:09.410 --> 46:09.630
Okay?

46:11.830 --> 46:13.670
And they're not being honest here

46:13.670 --> 46:14.530
because they're just,

46:14.770 --> 46:16.370
they're not trying to circumcise them

46:16.370 --> 46:17.970
so that they can be a part of Israel.

46:18.310 --> 46:20.230
They're trying to do it because they're wimps

46:20.970 --> 46:22.250
and they can't fight them

46:22.970 --> 46:23.910
when they're injured.

46:24.830 --> 46:25.230
Right?

46:25.330 --> 46:27.050
They're recovering from their circumcision or whatever

46:27.610 --> 46:29.770
and so they're trying to get the drop on them basically.

46:30.470 --> 46:30.710
Okay?

46:32.070 --> 46:33.110
And so, you know,

46:33.230 --> 46:34.630
you have Shekham going to his father

46:34.630 --> 46:36.530
and he's just like, you know,

46:36.830 --> 46:38.670
I want to have this woman,

46:38.670 --> 46:40.630
I want to marry her and so forth.

46:40.750 --> 46:43.750
Let's skip down to verse number 15 here.

46:44.350 --> 46:44.610
It says,

46:45.130 --> 46:47.270
but in this will we consent unto you

46:47.270 --> 46:49.230
if you will be as we be

46:49.230 --> 46:51.070
that every male of you be circumcised,

46:51.390 --> 46:54.970
then we will give our daughters unto you

46:54.970 --> 46:56.930
and we will take your daughters to us

46:56.930 --> 46:57.970
and we will dwell with you

46:57.970 --> 47:00.090
and we will become one people.

47:00.710 --> 47:02.870
Now, I don't think that's a good idea either though.

47:03.510 --> 47:04.250
You know what I mean?

47:04.590 --> 47:06.230
Like, hey, let's just mix them together

47:06.230 --> 47:08.590
and we'll just be one big happy family or whatever.

47:09.090 --> 47:09.970
Nah, just take Shekham.

47:10.170 --> 47:10.470
You know what I mean?

47:11.170 --> 47:11.910
Just try to work with them

47:11.910 --> 47:13.610
or try to win the other people to the Lord.

47:14.190 --> 47:15.430
But here's the thing.

47:15.690 --> 47:18.030
The answer is not let's just kill them.

47:19.530 --> 47:19.810
Okay?

47:21.710 --> 47:23.150
Which is what happens.

47:23.750 --> 47:28.270
Simeon and Levi end up murdering the entire people here.

47:29.270 --> 47:30.930
Very excessive and very wrong.

47:31.510 --> 47:31.790
Okay?

47:32.670 --> 47:34.170
Now, I believe 100%

47:34.170 --> 47:35.450
that they were wrong in doing this.

47:35.450 --> 47:36.290
They're very excessive.

47:36.730 --> 47:39.610
God doesn't even institute that type of punishment for fornication.

47:40.130 --> 47:41.750
They're being very, very excessive.

47:42.070 --> 47:43.470
But I will say this though.

47:44.350 --> 47:49.230
Even though it is excessive, unwarranted, wrong, sinful,

47:50.090 --> 47:51.730
it doesn't mean people won't do it.

47:53.490 --> 47:54.550
So you think to yourself,

47:54.710 --> 47:55.430
well, I'm gonna do it,

47:55.510 --> 47:57.510
but nothing's gonna happen to me

47:57.510 --> 47:58.230
because that would be wrong.

47:58.350 --> 47:59.110
Yeah, it would be wrong,

47:59.170 --> 48:00.630
but you know there's some crazy people out there though.

48:02.110 --> 48:02.910
And you know what?

48:02.910 --> 48:05.050
There might be a dad out there that will kill you

48:05.830 --> 48:08.110
if you commit fornication with his daughter or something.

48:08.850 --> 48:11.670
It'll be wrong, but you think he cares?

48:13.070 --> 48:14.150
Yeah, but it's still wrong.

48:14.430 --> 48:16.650
I agree for sure.

48:17.210 --> 48:18.030
But you know what?

48:18.090 --> 48:19.510
When you're dead, it doesn't really matter.

48:22.510 --> 48:25.470
Go ahead and say, hey, this is wrong as he's killing you.

48:27.170 --> 48:28.430
Hey, this isn't biblical.

48:28.690 --> 48:29.690
You shouldn't be doing this.

48:29.690 --> 48:31.370
Oh, okay.

48:32.490 --> 48:33.770
One more time, you know?

48:34.830 --> 48:36.470
And just slaying them.

48:37.290 --> 48:39.590
What I'm telling you is that I get it.

48:39.910 --> 48:40.770
These things are wrong,

48:40.950 --> 48:43.310
and Levi and Simeon are, you know,

48:43.410 --> 48:46.510
they're enacting godless vengeance

48:46.510 --> 48:48.350
for this whole situation.

48:49.190 --> 48:52.110
And it's just like, man, you guys are overkill, pun intended.

48:53.230 --> 48:54.870
You're just like, you're overkill.

48:55.110 --> 48:58.310
You're literally wiping out the entire family

48:58.310 --> 49:02.250
just because someone committed fornication with your sister.

49:02.530 --> 49:05.610
Why didn't you have that same zeal in accompanying your sister

49:05.610 --> 49:08.370
when she went to go see the daughters of the land?

49:08.770 --> 49:12.190
But now, you know, you just murdered a bunch of people

49:12.190 --> 49:14.070
over this particular sin.

49:14.450 --> 49:15.030
It's wrong.

49:15.590 --> 49:17.410
You know, you guys just exaggerated.

49:17.930 --> 49:18.410
And you know what?

49:19.150 --> 49:20.310
Again, I don't agree with it.

49:20.990 --> 49:22.250
But I'm just telling you right now,

49:22.450 --> 49:23.350
I've grown up with people

49:23.350 --> 49:26.010
who would be excessive about certain punishments.

49:27.870 --> 49:29.470
People think it was right or wrong.

49:31.910 --> 49:34.690
You know, you have people who, like, adultery is committed.

49:35.150 --> 49:35.670
You just never know.

49:35.910 --> 49:38.850
The husband might take the life of both his wife

49:39.490 --> 49:41.590
and the guy she's committing adultery with.

49:41.830 --> 49:43.010
It's not right for him to do that.

49:43.710 --> 49:45.090
It's not right, but guess what?

49:45.330 --> 49:46.770
It does happen now, doesn't it?

49:47.570 --> 49:48.210
So you know what?

49:48.270 --> 49:51.070
Before you decide to get involved

49:51.070 --> 49:54.250
and commit fornication and commit sins that are wrong,

49:54.250 --> 49:55.450
and you think to yourself,

49:55.570 --> 49:57.190
well, yeah, fornication is wrong,

49:57.270 --> 49:58.250
but it's not worthy of death.

49:58.530 --> 49:58.770
True.

50:00.810 --> 50:01.730
But you know what?

50:01.870 --> 50:04.470
According to the person who might enact vengeance upon you,

50:04.550 --> 50:05.810
they may not have that same standard.

50:06.890 --> 50:08.390
You know, you just never know.

50:08.790 --> 50:13.330
You might be facing the bottom of a shotgun.

50:14.170 --> 50:15.550
And you go ahead and quote scripture

50:15.550 --> 50:16.670
and see how that does for you.

50:17.850 --> 50:19.830
You know, hey, this is not worthy of death.

50:23.530 --> 50:27.450
You know, and you know, you'll be in heaven.

50:29.630 --> 50:30.570
Shortly thereafter.

50:31.950 --> 50:35.130
And we're like, man, well, that was a little excessive.

50:36.330 --> 50:38.470
Well, they kind of overreacted a little bit.

50:40.030 --> 50:40.510
Yeah.

50:41.470 --> 50:42.490
But I'm just trying to, like,

50:43.390 --> 50:45.850
I'm trying to appeal to you to understand that,

50:45.850 --> 50:50.050
you know, just because this action was excessive

50:50.050 --> 50:52.030
doesn't mean that it's not going to happen.

50:54.470 --> 50:57.370
And look, you know, I grew up, you know, around people

50:57.830 --> 51:00.150
that if their sister was defiled,

51:00.290 --> 51:02.090
and by the way, when it says defiled, it doesn't mean raped.

51:02.650 --> 51:05.470
Sometimes people have this wrong interpretation of the scripture

51:05.470 --> 51:06.710
that it means like he raped her.

51:07.010 --> 51:08.930
No, it means that they committed fornication.

51:10.430 --> 51:14.490
You know, I grew up with people who were just like,

51:14.490 --> 51:15.910
you know, they defiled the sister,

51:16.430 --> 51:17.430
and they go and whooped the guy.

51:18.190 --> 51:19.530
They beat him down hard.

51:20.850 --> 51:21.110
Okay?

51:21.930 --> 51:24.950
And, you know, overkill, and, you know,

51:26.110 --> 51:27.310
beat him to a bloody pulp.

51:27.390 --> 51:28.390
It wasn't right, but it doesn't matter.

51:28.470 --> 51:29.430
They don't care if it's right or wrong.

51:30.010 --> 51:31.010
And the heat of the moment,

51:31.110 --> 51:32.870
they're going to whoop someone's behind.

51:33.750 --> 51:34.890
Got to pause a little bit.

51:36.050 --> 51:36.530
You know?

51:36.950 --> 51:38.030
And that's what's going to happen.

51:39.210 --> 51:39.690
You understand?

51:40.210 --> 51:43.490
And so, yeah, this demonstrates the excessiveness.

51:43.490 --> 51:45.250
You know, this is Simeon being,

51:45.910 --> 51:47.370
having zeal without knowledge.

51:47.770 --> 51:49.230
And of course, it pictures Levi,

51:49.770 --> 51:51.510
Levi pictures the Old Testament law

51:51.510 --> 51:54.090
because, you know, it slays the person, right?

51:54.810 --> 51:55.950
The law, that's what the law does.

51:56.210 --> 51:57.470
But this is also demonstrating,

51:57.590 --> 51:58.930
it should be a principle to you and to me,

52:00.250 --> 52:01.830
that don't think that,

52:02.430 --> 52:04.470
oh, I'm going to commit this sin.

52:04.870 --> 52:05.910
I'm going to do this,

52:06.130 --> 52:09.770
because the consequence to this is not as severe.

52:09.990 --> 52:10.450
What's going to happen?

52:10.510 --> 52:11.610
I'm going to get kicked out for a little bit.

52:11.670 --> 52:12.330
I could just repent.

52:12.330 --> 52:14.210
You don't know what consequences

52:14.210 --> 52:16.110
may come with your actions.

52:17.170 --> 52:18.390
You just never know.

52:18.630 --> 52:18.910
Why?

52:19.210 --> 52:21.250
Because you could actually pay more

52:21.250 --> 52:22.310
than what you wanted to pay.

52:23.750 --> 52:24.170
Understand?

52:25.270 --> 52:27.290
And so, you know, yeah, they were excessive.

52:27.690 --> 52:29.190
And man, that sucks to die.

52:29.330 --> 52:30.450
You get circumcised.

52:31.790 --> 52:33.430
You're already in, and then you just,

52:33.450 --> 52:34.370
you just get killed.

52:34.970 --> 52:36.490
And you didn't even get a chance to get married.

52:37.090 --> 52:37.870
That's embarrassing.

52:40.130 --> 52:40.910
That sucks.

52:41.610 --> 52:42.570
Think about that.

52:43.250 --> 52:44.150
I think about that.

52:44.850 --> 52:45.830
You know, he's like,

52:46.430 --> 52:48.050
let's do it guys, let's all get circumcised

52:48.050 --> 52:49.650
so I can get married.

52:50.050 --> 52:51.970
And then, you know, he does it

52:51.970 --> 52:53.750
and here comes Simeon and Levi,

52:53.970 --> 52:55.510
like, what are you doing with that sword?

52:57.130 --> 52:57.750
What's up?

52:59.350 --> 53:00.270
What's going on?

53:01.150 --> 53:02.430
And just slays everyone.

53:03.750 --> 53:05.110
Excessive, yes, but you know what?

53:05.590 --> 53:07.050
This is exactly what happens

53:07.050 --> 53:08.050
when you're dealing with people

53:08.050 --> 53:09.750
who don't care about a standard

53:09.750 --> 53:11.270
and they're at the heat of the moment.

53:12.050 --> 53:13.750
I mean, there's people in this world

53:13.750 --> 53:16.530
that will shoot you for just the dumbest stuff.

53:17.290 --> 53:19.230
They will take your life for road rage.

53:20.190 --> 53:20.870
That's a fact.

53:21.490 --> 53:23.570
They will beat you down to a bloody pulp.

53:23.670 --> 53:25.310
They will kill you with their bare hands

53:25.310 --> 53:27.190
just for looking at them cock-eyed.

53:27.890 --> 53:28.790
I promise you that.

53:28.890 --> 53:30.510
There's people in this world that are like that.

53:31.130 --> 53:32.330
It doesn't make you right,

53:32.610 --> 53:33.650
but let me just tell you right now,

53:33.990 --> 53:34.830
it does happen.

53:39.130 --> 53:41.270
And so, you know, this is what took place.

53:41.570 --> 53:44.710
It says in verse, let's skip down to verse number 25.

53:44.910 --> 53:44.990
It says,

53:45.130 --> 53:46.430
And it came to pass on the third day

53:46.430 --> 53:47.750
when they were sore

53:48.590 --> 53:50.630
that two of the sons of Jacob, Simeon and Levi,

53:50.930 --> 53:52.810
Dinah's brother, took each man his sword

53:52.810 --> 53:54.790
and came upon the city boldly.

53:54.970 --> 53:56.170
Yeah, you're real bold.

53:57.310 --> 53:58.750
And slew all the males

53:59.270 --> 54:01.530
and they slew Hamor and Shechem his son

54:01.530 --> 54:02.570
with the edge of the sword

54:02.570 --> 54:04.470
and took Dinah out of the Shechem's house

54:04.470 --> 54:05.190
and went out.

54:05.710 --> 54:07.550
And the sons of Jacob came upon the slain

54:07.550 --> 54:08.410
and spoiled the city

54:08.410 --> 54:10.050
because they had defiled their sister.

54:10.730 --> 54:12.810
They took their sheep and their oxen,

54:12.950 --> 54:14.950
their asses and that which was in the city

54:14.950 --> 54:16.530
and that which was in the field

54:16.530 --> 54:18.830
and all their wealth and all their little ones

54:18.830 --> 54:20.330
and their wives took they captive

54:20.330 --> 54:23.770
and spoiled even all that was in the house.

54:23.910 --> 54:25.350
Now, you know, this is why

54:25.350 --> 54:27.490
Jacob later on calls them instruments of cruelty.

54:28.730 --> 54:30.830
And we could possibly infer into the text

54:30.830 --> 54:32.850
that maybe one of the reasons they wanted to kill

54:32.850 --> 54:34.530
these people is not for Dinah's

54:34.530 --> 54:35.770
because they wanted all the other stuff.

54:36.290 --> 54:38.830
They wanted the spoils of the land, right?

54:39.550 --> 54:40.470
We don't know that.

54:40.570 --> 54:42.350
We could just infer based upon what we're looking at

54:42.350 --> 54:43.010
here in the text.

54:43.370 --> 54:44.230
It says in verse 30,

54:44.370 --> 54:45.750
in Jacob said to Simeon and Levi,

54:46.290 --> 54:48.590
ye have troubled me to make me

54:48.590 --> 54:51.190
to stink among the inhabitants of the land,

54:51.470 --> 54:53.830
among the Canaanites and the Parasites

54:53.830 --> 54:55.050
and I, being few in number,

54:55.350 --> 54:57.550
they shall gather themselves together against me

54:57.550 --> 54:58.250
and slay me

54:58.250 --> 55:00.230
and I shall be destroyed I

55:00.230 --> 55:01.430
and my house.

55:01.670 --> 55:03.770
So Jacob is concerned with this reputation here.

55:04.290 --> 55:05.010
He's just like,

55:05.070 --> 55:06.990
you're making me look bad before everyone

55:06.990 --> 55:09.110
by killing all these guys or whatever.

55:09.250 --> 55:09.850
You're making me stink.

55:10.390 --> 55:11.130
But here's the thing.

55:11.230 --> 55:12.630
Obviously, God is still with Jacob.

55:12.710 --> 55:13.550
He's still with Israel

55:14.010 --> 55:15.550
and he's still striking fear

55:15.550 --> 55:17.950
into the hearts of the people in the area.

55:18.210 --> 55:19.550
But, you know, at the same time,

55:19.630 --> 55:21.450
yeah, this is a bad testimony.

55:22.670 --> 55:23.570
And let me just say this.

55:23.710 --> 55:24.750
You know, part of what we can learn

55:24.750 --> 55:25.830
from this passage of Scripture

55:25.830 --> 55:28.870
is to make sure that you control your temper.

55:31.230 --> 55:31.630
You understand?

55:31.850 --> 55:32.770
If you're the type of person

55:32.770 --> 55:34.170
that is just super angry

55:34.830 --> 55:37.290
or you're just a super emotional person

55:37.290 --> 55:38.770
that makes hasty decisions,

55:39.390 --> 55:41.590
such as beating someone down,

55:42.330 --> 55:43.730
such as, you know,

55:44.750 --> 55:45.910
shooting someone,

55:46.250 --> 55:47.330
you just out of anger

55:47.330 --> 55:48.630
end up striking someone

55:48.630 --> 55:50.510
because you can't control your temper,

55:51.070 --> 55:53.350
you know, you can become a bad testimony.

55:54.830 --> 55:55.910
You could be a person.

55:56.650 --> 55:59.310
You're basically making God look bad.

56:00.110 --> 56:01.470
Especially if they know that you're a Christian.

56:02.490 --> 56:03.410
And so be a person

56:03.410 --> 56:05.310
who has their temper under control.

56:05.610 --> 56:06.950
And of course, I'm preaching to myself

56:06.950 --> 56:07.570
because, you know,

56:08.070 --> 56:09.650
that's something that I believe I struggle with.

56:10.070 --> 56:11.730
That's like my best-setting sin

56:12.530 --> 56:14.510
is anger, wrath, and malice.

56:15.230 --> 56:17.570
You know, I have to put these things off of me

56:17.570 --> 56:19.730
because that's just a sin that I struggle with.

56:19.850 --> 56:19.990
You know?

56:20.490 --> 56:22.410
I'm just a naturally angry person

56:22.410 --> 56:24.590
and I can get very angry with people.

56:24.690 --> 56:25.730
Maybe it's just the way I grew up.

56:26.130 --> 56:27.570
But, you know, I have to make sure

56:27.570 --> 56:30.690
that I am slow to anger, right?

56:31.250 --> 56:32.550
That I'm filled with the spirit

56:32.550 --> 56:34.510
that I have rule over on my own spirit

56:34.510 --> 56:36.730
because at the end of the day

56:36.730 --> 56:38.490
the consequences can be deadly.

56:39.410 --> 56:41.470
And so before you decide to give

56:41.470 --> 56:43.590
the guy who cut you off,

56:43.990 --> 56:47.470
you know, telling him that he's number one

56:48.330 --> 56:49.150
or whatever

56:49.930 --> 56:51.890
and using both hands or whatever

56:52.490 --> 56:54.650
or speeding up and cutting him off,

56:55.510 --> 56:56.750
you know, think about this story

56:58.450 --> 56:59.690
because at the end of the day

56:59.690 --> 57:01.030
you could end up doing something

57:01.030 --> 57:03.390
that can cause you your life.

57:04.530 --> 57:04.830
You know?

57:05.270 --> 57:06.570
And look, we've all done it

57:06.570 --> 57:07.950
where someone cuts us off

57:07.950 --> 57:08.950
and then we just drive up

57:08.950 --> 57:10.410
and we just want to look at them.

57:13.950 --> 57:14.730
I've done it.

57:14.830 --> 57:15.910
I probably will still do it.

57:16.510 --> 57:16.710
You know?

57:16.710 --> 57:19.790
And luckily 99.9% of the time

57:19.790 --> 57:20.510
it's a woman

57:23.030 --> 57:25.390
or it's like 99% of the time

57:25.390 --> 57:26.510
it's an Asian woman

57:26.510 --> 57:28.470
and it's just like

57:31.690 --> 57:33.850
or 99.9% of the time

57:33.850 --> 57:36.830
it's an elderly Asian woman.

57:38.070 --> 57:39.270
So how do you know that?

57:39.430 --> 57:40.230
The long visor,

57:41.290 --> 57:43.630
the glove on the left hand

57:43.630 --> 57:44.890
or whatever so she doesn't get

57:44.890 --> 57:46.270
tanned and burned up or whatever.

57:46.750 --> 57:47.690
Y'all know what I'm talking about.

57:48.590 --> 57:49.610
You know, I'm talking about

57:49.610 --> 57:51.630
the huge visor, right?

57:53.610 --> 57:54.090
You know?

57:55.030 --> 57:56.390
But, you know, you just never know.

57:56.650 --> 57:58.110
You got to be careful with road rage

57:58.110 --> 57:59.350
because it can cause you your life.

58:00.210 --> 58:00.470
Okay?

58:01.290 --> 58:02.150
You know, maybe that

58:02.730 --> 58:03.750
Chinese ladies pack

58:03.750 --> 58:04.630
and you just never know.

58:04.790 --> 58:05.130
You know what I mean?

58:07.850 --> 58:10.010
The point being here is,

58:10.170 --> 58:11.690
you know, what does this story teach us?

58:11.970 --> 58:13.030
Well, it teaches us that

58:13.030 --> 58:15.270
you know, we as parents

58:15.270 --> 58:17.070
need to make sure that when God tells us

58:17.070 --> 58:18.910
to go to Bethel, you just go to Bethel

58:19.370 --> 58:21.670
because you can open up an entire can

58:21.670 --> 58:23.510
of worms by going to Sheikham instead.

58:24.330 --> 58:26.610
Partial obedience can cause a lot of problems.

58:27.330 --> 58:28.630
It's also teaching us that, you know,

58:28.670 --> 58:30.510
we need to make sure we supervise our children.

58:31.250 --> 58:33.450
Don't be a helicopter, okay?

58:34.130 --> 58:36.130
And don't keep your kids in a bubble

58:36.130 --> 58:37.110
or something like that

58:37.530 --> 58:38.950
where every time they fall down

58:38.950 --> 58:40.270
and scrape their leg, you're just like,

58:40.270 --> 58:41.910
oh, they're going to die.

58:43.830 --> 58:45.630
You know, let them toughen up a little bit.

58:45.750 --> 58:46.490
They're going to be fine.

58:47.330 --> 58:49.390
You know, you need to make sure

58:49.390 --> 58:51.510
that you have a balance in that area, okay?

58:52.450 --> 58:54.230
You know, but you know, make sure

58:54.230 --> 58:56.350
you pay attention to who your kids

58:56.350 --> 58:57.150
are hanging around with

58:58.490 --> 58:59.870
and monitor that.

59:01.210 --> 59:01.450
Okay?

59:01.650 --> 59:02.830
Monitor who they're talking to.

59:03.250 --> 59:04.530
You better monitor these cousins.

59:05.630 --> 59:06.970
You better monitor these uncles.

59:07.750 --> 59:09.130
You better monitor these neighbors.

59:09.870 --> 59:11.230
Better monitor whatever

59:11.230 --> 59:13.230
because you just never know.

59:14.250 --> 59:16.010
And so you're like, well, you know,

59:16.750 --> 59:18.230
people are going to criticize me

59:18.230 --> 59:20.230
if I'm like that or it may be

59:20.230 --> 59:22.090
excessive in some people's eyes.

59:22.690 --> 59:23.750
Yeah, but those same people

59:23.750 --> 59:25.330
are not going to be there for you

59:25.330 --> 59:27.250
when everything's just completely falling apart

59:27.250 --> 59:28.830
and you're left out to pick up the pieces.

59:29.950 --> 59:31.310
They're not going to help you out.

59:32.370 --> 59:33.750
So who gives a rip what they say?

59:34.990 --> 59:35.430
Okay?

59:35.590 --> 59:36.210
Because I'm dad.

59:36.770 --> 59:37.610
My wife's the mom.

59:37.610 --> 59:40.250
We bear the brunt of the work here.

59:40.930 --> 59:41.930
And so, you know,

59:42.150 --> 59:43.410
we just need to block all that out

59:43.410 --> 59:45.270
and recognize, no, you know,

59:45.490 --> 59:46.250
let me be criticized,

59:46.370 --> 59:47.330
but I'm just going to go ahead

59:47.330 --> 59:49.290
and do my best to raise my kids

59:49.290 --> 59:50.350
in this manner

59:50.350 --> 59:52.410
and protect who they're befriending,

59:53.090 --> 59:54.770
protect them from bad associations

59:54.770 --> 59:56.190
because I don't want them

59:56.190 --> 59:57.810
to get some worldly appetite

59:57.810 --> 59:59.490
to develop these relationships

59:59.490 --> 01:00:00.790
that I don't approve of

01:00:00.790 --> 01:00:02.930
and it can become like a dino situation.

01:00:03.710 --> 01:00:04.070
That's right.

01:00:04.190 --> 01:00:05.410
Father, we thank you so much for your word

01:00:05.410 --> 01:00:07.270
and thank you for the story here.

01:00:07.270 --> 01:00:09.990
Help us as your people, as parents, Lord,

01:00:10.050 --> 01:00:11.050
to do the best that we can

01:00:11.390 --> 01:00:14.270
to protect our kids from worldly influences,

01:00:15.270 --> 01:00:17.210
influences from unsafe family members

01:00:17.210 --> 01:00:18.230
or even neighbors, Lord,

01:00:18.710 --> 01:00:20.070
and sometimes even just other Christians.

01:00:20.750 --> 01:00:22.150
Help us to have the discernment to do so.

01:00:22.270 --> 01:00:23.970
I pray that you be with my cousin, Lord Oscar,

01:00:25.210 --> 01:00:26.910
and help him to have ears to hear

01:00:27.310 --> 01:00:28.570
and may you fill me with your spirit

01:00:28.570 --> 01:00:29.510
to preach the gospel to him.

01:00:29.630 --> 01:00:30.930
Lord, I do pray that he gets saved

01:00:32.230 --> 01:00:34.090
and Lord, may you be with his family,

01:00:34.170 --> 01:00:35.750
at least help me to get them saved as well

01:00:36.830 --> 01:00:38.590
and please use me in a great way to do so.

01:00:38.750 --> 01:00:40.570
Lord, I want to see my cousin in heaven

01:00:40.570 --> 01:00:41.870
and it breaks my heart that he's dying

01:00:42.270 --> 01:00:43.850
and I just pray you bless us

01:00:43.850 --> 01:00:44.630
as we go on our way

01:00:44.630 --> 01:00:45.810
in Jesus' name we pray. Amen.

