Alright, well once again it's great to be back here at Faithful Word Baptist Church
and it's great to see people that you know I've known from long ago
you know it's been a long time but also just so many new faces
and what I want to preach on here tonight is sermon called Friends Come
and Go. Friends Come and Go. Now when you think of friendship
probably the most quintessential verse in the Bible you think of is found here
in Proverbs
18 where it says here in verse 24, a man that have friends
must show himself friendly and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a
brother.
See the Bible says if you're gonna have friends you need to be friendly.
Instead of being the sort of person who's not going out there and trying to be a
friend to other people and just waiting for people to be a friend to you
the Bible says if you want good friends you've got to go out there and be a
friend
on to other people. Okay, now we're gonna look at that verse later on in the
sermon
but turn your Bible to Luke chapter 23. Luke 23
and when it comes to friendship you know I looked on A.I. you know what is the
definition of friendship according to the
average person in this world. Here are the four things that it mentions
on chat GBT it says someone who's there for you
someone you can count on someone who has your back
someone you can trust I think all of us would say those are good
definitions about being a friend. The thing I thought of before I looked on
chat GBT was this
someone who is there for you when you need them
is probably how I would define friendship. Okay,
now obviously depending on what age you are it kind of means something a little
bit different.
You know my kids have friends in the neighborhood
that they consider good friends. Why? Because they play with them.
It's not really because they can count on them but just because they enjoy
spending time with them.
I think we'd agree that friendships at a young age are usually based
on very shallow things. It's not like the people you're friends with in elementary
school
you're wondering well I wonder not if they're saved
I wonder what they believe about you know politics or abortion
or the LGBT. Now you're friends with people that you hang out with
right. Now of course you know friendships at a young age
they come and they go and of course they're based on very
shallow things you know things that are not really that important
okay. As you get older you start to form
more friendships you kind of reach that age you kind of solidify
who you are and what you believe right you know we've seen that on the college
campuses
it can be very receptive to the gospel. When I was in college you know we would
often go to the college campus and we find kids that were freshmen and
sophomore
and we found them to be very receptive. Now once you got past sophomore the
chances of getting saved drastically
decreased because they kind of figured out
who they are and what they believe they've already kind of decided on that
you know as freshmen and sophomore they were very receptive and I remember just
forming
good friendships people that love God people that are Christians people I went
to church with
and I kind of just assumed you know you form friendships
and they're gonna kind of last forever. Why? Because they're based on real
things
it's based on Christianity and serving God
and soul winning. But you know what you find in all stages of life
friends come and friends go
that's just reality. I mean I wish I could stand up here and tell you that
everybody you're friends with today you're gonna be friends with in ten
years from now
it's just not true. And of course being a member at this church
you've seen people come and you've seen people go
and it happens it's just like every year
new people are here new people leave people come people go
and reality is friends come in life and friends go
okay. Now notice what it says here in Luke 23 verse 12
it says in the same day Pilate and Herod
were made friends together for before that
they before they were at enmity between themselves. See the Bible says with
Pilate and Herod
they were enemies they didn't get along
they weren't friends but they became friends. Why?
because they had a common enemy and boy don't you see that online
you've got all these people the only thing they have in common
is they hate this church. They hate soul winning churches
they hate your pastor and it's like they've got a friendship formed
on hate. That's not really a good recipe for a long lasting friendship is it
it's based on hatred of other people
right. Now go in your Bible to Matthew 26
Matthew 26. That verses kinda like the
NIFB archives friendship right it's like their whole friendship is based on just
hatred
you know people doesn't matter what they believe it's like well we hate the
same person
so we're gonna be friends right. Obviously that's a stupid reason to form a
friendship
what I want to do is give you just four reasons here today
of why friends come and go and honestly this is not a negative sermon
because at the end of the sermon I'm gonna give you three applications that are
very encouraging in my opinion okay. Now obviously no matter who you are
whether you're a Christian or not friends come and friends go
but I want to look at the perspective from being a fundamental Baptist
someone who loves God why is it that many of your friends
are not gonna be your friends in five years and why is it that many people
you're friends with five years ago
are not your friend today. I mean is that not true for those of you that have
been around here for a while
many people that you consider good friends
and close friends five years ago you're not friends with them anymore are
you
why friends come and friends go
we're number one one reason why friends come and go you're in Matthew 26 go to
verse 47
because some of your friends might be Judas Iscariots
some of your friends are actually just bad people
wicked people and honestly you're not really friends with them
they're just pretending to be your friend but actually they're a bad person
they're a wicked person notice what it says in Matthew 26 verse 47
and while he yet spake low Judas one of the twelve came and with them a
great multitude with swords
and staves from the chief priests and elders of the people
now he that betrayed him gave them a sign saying whomesoever I shall kiss that
same as he
hold him fast and forthwith he came to Jesus and said hail master
and kissed him and Jesus said unto him friend
wherefore art thou come then came they and laid hands on Jesus and took
him look the Bible
says here Jesus referred to Judas
as a friend obviously Judas was a wicked person
he was an evil person and the Bible says Jesus was aware of that
but Jesus spent time with him he hung out with him
and what the reality is that in our lives
they're gonna be Judas Iscariots at a church like faithful word Baptist
church
and honestly if you go way back in time
fifteen years ago even when the church was small
I mean it's kind of crazy that even in the early days
I mean this church with the truth was attracting some bad people to it
even in the early days the church right towards the beginning
and look any real church and bonafide church that is doing something for God
you know what's gonna take place
the devil's gonna try to stop it so how does he stop it well I mean one
way he does it
is he sends Judas Iscariots in your path and they act like you
they pretend to be like you they pretend to love the church
they pretend to love the preaching and then all of a sudden one day it's like
a 180 or it's not a 180 in one day
maybe they just suddenly try to cause problems in church until their cover is gone
and then all of a sudden they're just out of here and said man that church is
evil or whatever
right you know what I'm talking about you've seen it many times haven't you
right now go in your Bible to Psalm 41
Psalm 41 I think one thing that's cool in 2026
is that you can do soul-winning events and missions trips
and a great way to remember that is to get a picture
awesome right you get you go soul-winning
then you get a picture with a nice backdrop it's a wonderful experience
you remember man we had
you know what is it on here 21 soul winners
and 18 salvation I mean praise God for those things you got the picture you
remember it
and unfortunately many times you look back at pictures from five years ago and
it's like well there's a Judas
there's a Judas and it kinda ruins the picture
you know we've got you know a lot of pictures on our wall at the church
and it's like you got missions trip pictures and it's like
you know there's one photo in particular there's like nine people in the
photo it's like
five of them are bad and it's like man that picture is tainted for all
eternity
right but it happens where people you think are your friend you think
they're good people they act like you and in reality
they're actually a Judas they're just a bad person some 41 verse 9 the Bible says
yay my own familiar friend in whom I trusted which did eat my bread have
lifted up his heel against me
look I believe this is ultimately fulfilled in Jesus Christ but I also
think it's mentioned in Psalms
because the fact David he had a lot of enemies
and honestly anyone that lives godly is gonna have enemies they're gonna
have Judas's that come around
and it's frustrating
I wish I could say something different today
but you know this is true
it's a lot of people they want to just kind of pretend things are not real and
they don't want the truth
last I checked the Bible says that the church is the pillar in the ground of
the truth
look nobody wants to go to a hospital go to the doctors and find out
you know what you've got a major problem you need surgery
immediately
but here's the thing I mean if you actually need surgery
isn't it just better to know that
then have this major problem and the doctor didn't tell you because he didn't
want to hurt your feelings
I mean you need triple bypass heart surgery
but I don't want to hurt your feelings so yeah you're doing good
yeah maybe lose a few pounds you know drink some you know grape juice
eat more protein you know less sugar
you're gonna be good nothing much major
and that's ridiculous and yet that's the way churches operate
they don't say things that are negative why because they want to just give a
positive message because that's what people want to hear
you know one thing I find amazing is people come and visit church
and sometimes they love the preaching
they love the sermons they love the preaching
they're coming every week they're loving the preaching and then that one
sermon comes
that hits on their sin and they hate it
and they're gone never to come again
see why would you want to go to church to just hear things that you already
believe
and levels you've already attained and not be told
you need to change this is what the Bible says
if you want to grow you need preaching that preaches against your sin
I mean how do you expect people to change unless you say hey it's wrong
you gotta make a change
but yet people don't want churches like that
they just want to be lied to and look obviously there's people that want the
truth though
you say what's the proof I mean look there's plenty of people that want the
truth
they want to hear the word of God preached but there's
a larger amount of people even save people that they don't really want the
truth
they don't want to know what the Bible says go to 2nd Samuel 13
excuse me 2nd Samuel 13 look I don't think this is in my notes but you
know the Bible says he that walketh with wise men shall be wise
but a companion of fools shall be destroyed
one thing that's great about a church like this is that when you have a soul
winning culture at church and people are kind of new
it's like well what activities do you have a church
it's like well you know let's see
on Monday we got a 5 p.m. activity on Tuesday on Wednesday on Thursday on
Friday on Saturday on Sunday
and we've got events if you want to go to them and look I get that's not the only
events
but it's like the main focus of this church has always been
so winning
me honestly you know one of the big things I liked about this preaching when
I first started listening and you know either 2007 or 2008
was just a big emphasis on soul winning
because honestly I was trying to go soul winning I was talking to people
I didn't really know what I was doing
and nobody else is really doing it and it's kind of hard to motivate yourself
even if you know you should do it it's kind of hard to just motivate
yourself right
but if you walk with wise men and you walk with people that love God you know
what's the result
they rub off on you in a good way
but if you walk with fools
they're also going to rub off on you
in a bad way
notice what it says here in 2 Samuel 13 verse 1
and it came to pass after this that Absalom the son of David had a fair
sister his name was Tamar
and Amnon the son of David loved her and Amnon was so vexed that he fell sick
for a sister Tamar for she was a virgin and Amnon thought it hard for him to do
anything to her
but Amnon had a friend
whose name was Jonah dabb the son of Shimea David's brother and Jonah dabb
was a very
subtle man and in this story Jonah dabb is basically a picture of the devil
he's a bad person and Amnon realizes
hey I shouldn't do anything it's wrong it's wicked
obviously fornication is wrong but he had
a friend a friend that basically put him in a position where
that was the inevitable result cause
Amnon had a friend well let's see how good of a friend
Amnon really was now I'm not going to go through this entire story but jump
down to verse 32
after everything's taken place and obviously Amnon
not Amnon but Jonah dabb has or Amnon has forced his half sister
and then Absalom gets mad and he gets killed and he's dead and remember his
friend
Jonah dabb his best bud his best friend and notice what it says here in verse 32
and Jonah dabb the son of Shimea David's brother answered and said
let not my Lord suppose that they have slain all the young men the king
sons
for Amnon only is dead
for by the appointment of Absalom this has been determined from the day that he
forced his sister Tamar
now therefore let not my Lord the king take the thing to his heart to think
that all the king's sons are dead
for Amnon only is dead
I mean can you imagine if your supposed best friend died
and then all the sudden after he's dead it's just like well let me just
spill the beans on exactly what took place no big deal not all your sons
are dead
I mean he died because this is what he did
right
I think the Bible said that he that covered a transgressions he could love
and you would expect a friend to love you
and care about you
but not Amnon's friend he's just like well you know this is what he did
why
he's a bad person
he wasn't a real friend
he did what benefited him
right he was a Judas
and go in your Bible to 1st John 2
1st John 2
you know one thing you need to realize is that it's it's often hard
for a pastor to tell if someone is a Judas
you know why that is
because
Judas's
acts a certain way in front of the pastor
and they act a different way in front of other people
I mean there's this guy we kicked out of our church five years ago
and I really like the guy
I mean he was always super nice to me
he's super friendly
and then all of a sudden everybody said yeah him and his wife talk trash about you
at every church service to everybody
I'm like what in the world
I mean they acted like my friend I mean they pretended to be my friend
but in reality
no they're just talking trash about me all the time
right and whether that not they were Judas they were certainly a wicked person
and you know sometimes it's hard because people act a certain way and the other thing is
sometimes you know church members
might have information and they might just not tell the pastor because they're like well I don't want to involve the pastor
I don't want to bother him
you know sometimes you got to let the pastor know about things
because you might think that they're aware of things and oftentimes
they're just not they haven't been told because everyone's thinking
I'm sure somebody else told him
and yet nobody has
so what do you do if you find out somebody is
a Judas Iscariot
you say well how do you know somebody is Judas Iscariot well
one thing is if they leave a church that's preaching the truth
after being here for years
and then they join some heretical church like the Pentecostal church or the
Orthodox church
or the Catholic church I mean they've been here for years
they've gone soul-inning with you and then they do a complete 180 on what it
takes to get to heaven
it's like what what in the world
I heard that person give the gospel and nothing they said was wrong
and now all the sudden they're saying this you got to keep the sacraments
like what in the world is going on well they were Judas Iscariot
and here's what the Bible says in 1 John 2 verse 18
little children it is the last time and as you have heard that anti-Christ
shall come
even now are there many anti-Christ whereby we know that it is the
last time
they went out from us
but they were not of us for if they had been of us they would no doubt have
continued with us
but they went out that they might be made manifest that they were not all of
us
a lot of people look at these verses and they say well wait a minute
this is saying that if you leave the church
that means that you were never saved
wait a minute does the Bible say that you have to be in church until the
day you die to go to heaven
I mean is being a member of church evidence of being saved
or evidence of that you're on your way to heaven
no
but the context in 1 John 2 is about the things you believe
because it said in verse number 18 it said that anti-Christ shall come
see the Bible is talking about doctrine and things you believe
and the Bible is saying hey somebody is at the church
and believes certain things and then they leave and all of a sudden they're
like man you know what
I believe in the Orthodox Church
I believe in the Catholic Church
it's like man you were never of us
now look if somebody leaves this church and becomes a drunkard there's no
reason to question their salvation
they got into sin
but if they leave this church and change their beliefs
specifically about salvation or other major doctrines associated it's kind
of like wait a minute
you went out from us
but you are not of us
you know one of the things that's scary about this is somebody can be at a
church for a long time
as a Judas
and you don't realize it
when I started reading the Bible I just kind of assumed that a Judas
like three years was the maximum
I just kind of figured the Bible is showing you hey he lasted three years
and so if you're around for more than three years it means that you're
not really a bad person
but I think we've all seen that that's not really the case
I mean I just remember when I was here I mean
you know Garrett Kirchway was a member of the church
I mean he was going to be a missionary I liked him at the time I thought he was a
great guy and then all of a sudden it's like man
you know we used to joke about it it's like you know that Pentecostal soul
winning demonstration
it wasn't really a demonstration it was the real thing but he never actually
believed
because he still was on this he was still into that doctrine
it's like but wait a minute you were with us for years
and yet you never actually really believed
and yet
this happens
go in your Bible to Luke chapter eight
Luke eight
look you know I wish this weren't true but you just got to realize it that
there will be people that will be bad people in church and they'll be at
the church and then all of a sudden it gets revealed and they're gone and
you know the thing is people hear this preaching
but before they experience it
it's like they believe it intellectually
but they don't really get it
and then you're at the church and you see it happen
it's like okay I got it
I thought I got it before
but now I've experienced it with my own eyes it's like I get it now
okay someone is just pretending
to be like us
for their own personal benefit or whatever reason that they choose but
they're actually a Judas Iscariot a bad person
but number two
friends come and go because
some people backslide
somebody might love God now
they go soul winning now they love the church now but they might just backslide
one day and just
quit the church
here's what it says in Luke chapter eight verse fourteen
Luke eight verse fourteen
and that which fell among thorns are they which when they have heard
go forth
and are choked with cares and riches and pleasures of this life
and bring no fruit to perfection
so the parable of the sower you've got four people listed the first does not get
saved the last clearly get saved and people debate on the second third
I believe the second and the third get saved but
they don't end up zealously serving God
and see the Bible says here in verse fourteen
that they go forth so the thing is
they start to
they start to do
serve God they start to do something but what happens they are choked with the
cares
and riches and pleasures of this life
and what's the result they bring no fruit to perfection
now of course the Calvinist would look at this and say no wait a minute
no fruit
no salvation
but is that what the Bible saying here in Luke eight
see the thing is if you're gonna be a soul winner and bring forth fruit
as the Bible says the fruit of the righteous is a tree of life and he
that when its souls is wise
you gotta go all out serving God
I remember you know when I first got saved and you know I start to make some
changes in my life but honestly
the biggest thing that caused me to make changes is I started to preach the
gospel to people
and I just thought to myself you know what I feel like I'd be much more
effective
if I got sent out of my life
and I just felt like you know what it's just kinda holding me back
and then because of soul winning that is actually what motivated me
to start living more for God
because I said man I don't want somebody to go to hell because I'm not zealous
enough
I'm not right with God I was like I need to make some changes in my life
I wish I could say that when you first get saved immediately you just get
rid of all your worldliness
and all your sin and just all you do is serve God
but honestly if you're serving God today you know what that means
it means you got saved and you started to grow
and it is a slow process and all of us hopefully are still growing and growing
closer to God right now
rather than backsliding
see the Bible says
people go forth
but they're choked with cares and riches and pleasures of this life
verse 15
but that on the good ground are they which in an honest and good heart
having heard the word keep it
and bring forth fruit with patience
so the Bible says in verse 15 this is the person that ends up really
serving God
what happens
well you know those on the good ground you know these people get saved and then
they have an honest heart
and a good heart
so every time they hear the word of God you know what they do
they keep it
they slowly grow
and then they bring forth fruit with patience
year by year
thirty sixty a hundred or whatever the number
just keeps all winning
keep getting people saved week after week after week after week after week
go to 2nd Timothy chapter 4
I mean just think about this logically
let's say you're at church
and there's someone that you become very close to
because every Sunday you go soul winning with them
you're in the same group you go soul winning with them
so you're around them
you talk to them
and it's pretty inevitable when you go soul winning with people on a pretty
regular basis you end up becoming friends pretty much
you get very closely connected
one of the things I love about Christianity
is you know honestly people come from very different backgrounds
have very different interests
and if it were not for serving God in Christianity
honestly you know most of us probably wouldn't be friends
but we have that common connection of loving God and serving God and going soul winning
and that is a million times greater and more important than anything else
what happens if you're really good friends with someone and every Sunday
you're going soul winning and all of a sudden they just stop soul winning
well you're no longer around them to fellowship
let's say they start missing church services
while you're no longer around them
I mean if they're not a church to fellowship with
you're probably not going to be hanging out with them outside of church
and what ends up taking place
it doesn't matter how close you were to them
eventually you're just going to kind of go separate ways
because one person is going this direction
the other is going this direction
Second Timothy chapter 4 gives us a great example
it says here in verse 10
for Deimos hath forsaken me
having loved this present world
and is departed under Thessalonica
Crescent, Sigalacia, Titus unto Dalmatia
and you know in this verse the Bible is highlighting that
Deimos is the one that loved the present world
Deimos is the one that foresook Paul
the Bible is saying that Deimos who once loved God
he once served God
he loved the present world
exactly what we saw in Luke chapter 8 verse 14
yes sometimes people can go forth and serve God
and their old sin or just worldly things
can be very tempting to them
and they're just thinking maybe I'll be happy
or maybe this Christianity thing is too intense
too much and if I just kind of loosen up
and allow a little bit of sin in my life
I'll be oh so happy
and why do people think that
because they look at the world
and everybody's got a smile on their face
right I mean people act like they're happy
people are getting drunk
and they've got smiles they've got all these pictures
man these great memories getting drunk
it's like well if you're having such a great time
why are you just erasing your memory with alcohol
why do you need alcohol to be happy
but they'll say they're happy
they'll pretend to be happy
right because you weep during the night
you show sadness during the night
I mean they just sleep sleeping the night
they'd be drunken or drunken in the night
but here's the thing you're going to wake up the next day
you're miserable you got a headache
your job's messed up I mean everything your life is messed up
and they'll act like they're happy but they're not happy
and the thing is when people try to tell you
why don't you just try this try alcohol
you know watch movies you know you do all these things
this is like wait a minute I'm already enjoying my life
so why would I need to change it
it's funny because people at your job they might ask you
hey what are you doing this weekend
and you're like hey you know what we're going up to Flagstaff
what are you doing in Flagstaff
you know we're going to preach the gospel
and then they're just like what
and they're like how can you find enjoyment in that
but the thing is we're not doing it out of a burden
we're out of a requirement we love serving God
look obviously we have our down moments
but look I like soul winning I like preaching
I enjoy preaching I enjoy getting up here and writing sermons
I believe it changes people's lives it affects people's lives
I enjoy it I enjoy preaching the gospel I enjoy reading the Bible
I like doing these things
and yeah you know when you're having days and you don't feel like doing it
you should do it out of obligation
but honestly I enjoy serving God
and these people that are living in sin they might say that they enjoy life
they don't really enjoy life though
sin leads to destruction sin leads to just reaping from what you've done
and just all kinds of consequences
and people are too stubborn and thick-headed to just admit you know what
I should just go back to coming to church
and serving God and reading the Bible
I was so much happier when I was not living in sin
verse 16
at my first answer no man stood with me
but all men forsook me
I pray God that it may not be laid to their charge
and look you know Paul speaks about the fact that people like Demis
backslid and he doesn't have the same friends that he used to have
why will Demis love the present world
and look some people that you are friends with today
even if you keep zealously serving God your whole life
they will not be your friends 10 years down the road
they will not be your friends five years down the road
because not all of your friends are likely to keep serving God their entire life
go in your Bible to Jude one
you say man I thought when a missionary came in it's like it's supposed to be a positive message
to encourage you
and you're like man I'm going to lose my friends
now look there's an encouragement at the end of the sermon
but you know this is reality
I speak from experience
that a lot of people that you're friends with are not going to be your friends down the road
I wish that weren't the case but look you know it if you've been serving God for years
there are some people that you used to be friends with
not anymore
why is that friends come and friends go
why is that well number one
because some of your friends might be Judas Iscariot
number two because some of your friends might backslide
number three because some of your friends are only your friends because you benefit their life
now this certainly can cross over into someone being a Judas Iscariot
and I'll show you a verse on that but it can certainly cross over to someone even being saved
as well
Jude 1 verse 16 notice what the Bible says
these are murmurs, complainers walking after their own lusts
in their mouth speaketh great swelling words
flattery
having men's persons in admiration
because of advantage
see the Bible says there are people that will flatter you
and pretend to care about you why out of advantage
they benefit from the friendship with you it's not sincere to them
the only reason that they're friends with you is because you benefit their life
now in Jude 1 this is referring to bad people
but go in your Bible to Judges 14
Judges 14
and look you know you've seen that through the years of people that would latch onto this church
why because they want to have a big church
they want to have a lot of members
and I'm not saying all of them are necessarily bad but some certainly are
some have proven themselves to be really bad people like the Bible says in Jude chapter 1
and the sad reality is some people will want to be your friend
why because they benefit from being friends with you
it's not that they want to just show themselves friendly
but they want something out of that friendship
they will use you for their own benefit
that's why they're friends with you
Judges 14 verse 20 the Bible says this
but Samson's wife was given to his companion
notice this whom he had used as his friend
look obviously Samson did some great things
being the Bible says he used his companion as a friend
I mean it wasn't sincere
he used him and unfortunately there are people that are going to use you
they'll pretend to care about you
they don't really care about you
they are friends with you for one reason why because you benefit their life
they don't care about benefiting your life
it's because you benefit their life
well here's the thing
what if you no longer benefit their life
they don't want to be friends anymore
it's the way it works
go to Esther chapter 5
Esther 5
and the Bible Haman is a really rotten character
and your rotten people will end up inevitably having rotten people that surround them
the Bible doesn't necessarily tell us if all of his friends that are mentioned here
are bad people as in reprobates or not
but I want you to notice what the Bible does say about them using Haman as a friend
notice what it says here in Esther 5 verse 10
nevertheless Haman refrained himself
and when he came home he sent and called for his friends
okay these are his friends
these are his companions
the people that he hangs out with
the people that he talks to
and he's a rest his wife
and Haman told them the glory of his riches
and the multitude of his children
and all the things wherein the king had promoted him
and how he had advanced him above the princes
and servants of the king
now I'll say this on a side point
Haman's not much of a friend
because notice he's telling his friends
look at how great and awesome I am
right
and notice what it says here
go down to verse 14
then said Zarest's wife
and all his friends onto him
let a gallows be made of 50 cubits high
and tomorrow speak thou unto the king
that Mordecai may be hang there on
then go thou and merrily with the king
unto the banquet
and the thing pleased Haman
and he caused the gallows to be made
so the friends of Haman
and his wife say hey you know what
basically here's our plan to get Mordecai put to death
these are his friends that are basically
telling him you should do this
okay obviously it doesn't work out well for Haman does it
chapter 6 verse 12
and Mordecai came again to the king's gate
but Haman hasted to his house mourning
and having his head covered
and Haman told Zarest's wife
and all his friends
everything that had befallen him
so the same people that said hey
here's how you're gonna kill Mordecai
he tells him this is what took place
then said his wise men
and Zarest's wife onto him
if Mordecai be of the seed of the Jews
before whom
thou
has begun to fall
so notice how they immediately say
you are the one that did this
it didn't say that we were part of this
thou has begun to fall
thou shalt not prevail against them
but shall surely fall before him
so what's taking place
Haman is surrounded by a bunch of people
that are using him
don't care about him at all
and then all of a sudden Haman's in trouble
and they're like you're the one
who did this
they immediately distance themselves
why because it doesn't benefit them anymore
obviously during this time
being friends with Haman would benefit you
because he's powerful
he's got money
and wealth make if many friends the Bible says
but now all of a sudden as the judgment's coming upon him
it's kind of like well you're the one
you know who did this
right and they distance themselves from him
I don't feel bad for a rotten guy like Haman
but the reality is
they're only friends because it benefits them
now go to your Bible to Luke chapter 10
Luke 10
there's a term known as a fair weather friend
and a fair weather friend means
a person who is friendly
only when it is easy
convenient or beneficial
but disappears when hardship
suffering or sacrifice is required
and see they're going to be people
that you consider a friend
and they need help
and you're there for them
like what do you need me to do
and then when the roles are reversed
and you need help
and you ask them for help
they're not there for you
I mean this happens all the time
where it's like you're investing your life
into being a friend
and then when you need a friend
it's like oh man I'm busy
I don't have time
it's like but I had time for you
I stepped in for you
and when the roles are reversed
they're not willing to do the same
right
point number one
why is it that many of your friends
are going to come and go
number one because some of your friends
are probably Judas Iscariot
number two
because some of your friends
are going to backslide
now the thing is
you know if you have friends
that backslide
and leave church
and quit serving God
here's the thing
you're part of a church
of people that love God
say man I want to have
some new friends in my life
look around
because the people you're
going to be close friends with
are the people serving God
when you love God
and when you're serving God
the people that you're going
to get connected to
and care about
are other people that love God
and so look
if you lose some friends
and some people quit the church
and you consider them a close friend
well here's the thing
there's other people to be friends with
and maybe if a church
was a small church
that would be a bit harder
but look
this isn't a small church
there's plenty of people
that you can be friends with
point number two
some are going to backslide
point number three
there are people that are
only your friend
when you benefit them
point number four
because there are people
that they're not
taking advantage of you
it's not that they're
only friends with you
because you benefit them
but they're not willing
to be friends with you
if it's going to hurt them
so it's not that they're
taking advantage of you
and they want to benefit
off your life
but they don't want to have
a negative effect on their life
because of that friendship
now before I show you
these verses
I want to show you
something here in Luke
chapter 10 verse 30
Luke 10 verse 30
and here's what it says
in Luke 10 verse 30
and Jesus answering said
a certain man
went down from Jerusalem
to Jericho
and fell among thieves
which stripped him
of his raiment
and wounded him
and departed
leaving him half dead
and by chance
there came down
a certain priest
that way
and when he saw him
he passed by
on the other side
and likewise
a Levite
when he's at the place
came and looked on him
and passed by
on the other side
but a certain man
a certain Samaritan
as he journeyed
came where he was
and when he saw him
he had compassion on him
and went to him
and bound up his wounds
pouring in
oil and wine
and set him on his own beast
and brought him to an inn
and took care of him
and on the morrow
when he departed
took out two pints
and gave them to the host
and said on to him
take care of him
and whatsoever
thou spendest more
when I come again
I will repay thee
which now of these three
thinkest thou was neighbor
on to him
that fell among the thieves
and he said
he that showed mercy on him
then said
Jesus on to him
go and do thou likewise
we know this
as the good Samaritan
the Bible says
which one was neighbor
on to him
there's a situation
where the Samaritan
is there
and he sees somebody in need
he's not friends
with this person
but when somebody needs help
isn't that just
the neighborly
and right thing to do
look you know
in our neighborhood
where we live
and I get the word
neighbor is not necessarily
referring to neighborhood
like we think of
but just like
the people you meet
the people you're around
but here's what I'm saying
it's like you know
people that are in our neighborhood
our kids are friends
with some of the neighborhood kids
my wife and I are not friends
with any of the people
in our neighborhood
you know we get along with them
they're fine
we'll say hello
but we're not close friends with them
but here's the thing
if one of my neighbors
fell over
and needed to be rushed to the hospital
I would immediately stop
what I was doing
and drive them to the hospital
you say why
it's just the neighborly
and right thing to do
when you see somebody need help
you help them
because here's the thing about this
at the beginning of the sermon
I said my definition of being a friend
is someone who's there for you
when you need them
but honestly
that's pretty low bar
to be in a friend
because honestly
that's just the neighborly thing to do
I mean if somebody needs help
you help them
and what's crazy
is when people you consider friends
are not even willing to do
what a neighbor would do
the neighborly thing
you think they're friends
but they're not there to help you at all
it's like man
you know some random person would see
man you need a need
and look
not
they don't even have to be saved
unsafe people would see someone
that needed help
and they would immediately help them
but I've seen videos online
where a car will crash
and get set on fire
and just a bunch of cars
will stop on the side of the road
and do everything to pull that person out
do you really think all those people
that did that are safe people
but it's just the neighborly
and right thing to do
why
because you have compassion in your heart
it's the right thing to do
and it's amazing
you would think someone's a friend
and then all of a sudden
they don't even do what's the neighborly thing
and go in your bible
to 2 Samuel chapter 1
2 Samuel 1
look the bible says
do unto others as you'd have done unto you
I mean if I'm in need of help
I would want somebody to help me
it's just the right thing to do
I mean you see somebody drowning in water
you should try to help them
right it's just the right thing to do
you don't have to be friends with them
you don't have to know them
it's just the right thing to do right
look if you need help
and people see that
the neighborly and right thing to do
is help someone when they're down
and of course you would expect a friend
when you need help
to be there
you'd imagine that you're drowning
and a friend just walked away from you
it's like what in the world
it's like I haven't needed you before
and now that I need you
it's just like well you know what
and they're not there for you
it's like not a very good friend right
notice what it says here in 2 Samuel chapter 1 verse 25
how are the mighty fallen in the midst of battle
oh Jonathan now was slain in thine high places
I am distressed for thee my brother Jonathan
very pleasant has thou been on to me
thy love to me was wonderful
passing the love of women
David speaks about this great friendship
that he had with Jonathan
look there is some truth to this
but honestly a lot of this
is just fuzzy memories from David
because notice what it says in 1 Samuel 23
1 Samuel 23
Jonathan was a great friend
at one time to David no doubt
but notice what it says here in 1 Samuel 23
1 Samuel 23 verse 8
and Saul called all the people together to war
to go down to Kayla to besiege David and his men
so here's another time where Saul is just going crazy
he's hunting down David
David is desperate
he's running for his life
and doing whatever just to survive
as Saul is coming after him
drop down to verse 13
then David and his men
which were about 600 arose
and departed out of Kayla
and went wither so ever they could go
but I was saying he's just doing whatever he can do
right he's going wither so ever he can go
and it was told Saul that David was escaped from Kayla
and he forbear to go forth
and David a boat in the wilderness and strongholds
and remained in a mountain in the wilderness of Ziff
and Saul sought him every day
but God delivered him not into his hand
and David saw that Saul was come out to seek his life
and David was in the wilderness of Ziff in a wood
and Jonathan Saul's son arose
and went to David into the wood
and strengthened his hand in God
and he said on to him
fear not
for the hand of Saul my father shall not find thee
and thou shalt be king over Israel
and I shall be next on to thee
and that also Saul my father knoweth
so what Jonathan says is hey you know what
I'm going to be a right hand man
I'm not trying to become the king
it's appointed to you
God has given it to you
I'm going to be there
you've been chosen
my dad knows it
I'm going to be right there with you
as your right hand man
verse 18
and they too made a covenant before the Lord
and David a boat in the wood
and Jonathan went to his house
see at this moment
if Jonathan were to stay there with David
he'd be making a real sacrifice
it would harm him
but here's the thing
Jonathan goes home to a nice bed
he's perfectly fine
and then David's in the middle of the wilderness
just trying to survive
let me ask you a question
during this time
as David is with 600 men
in the heat of battle trying to survive
and he's not around Jonathan
who do you think he feels closer to
the 600 men that are with him
they're actually there
in the heat of battle
I mean think of people that you used to consider friends
but they're not with you soul winning
they're not there in the important moments
who are you really going to feel closest to
the people that you go to war with
the people that you go to battle with
and look Jonathan was a great friend
and he made a lot of sacrifice
but you know what
here in 1 Samuel 23
David's there in the wilderness
he goes home and guess what
and the next time you see Jonathan in the Bible
he's dead
you don't see him anymore
but David's got other men that are with him
and look you might lose Jonathan's in your life
but then there's other men that are there with you
other men that are doing battle
other men that are your friends
and of course when you're fighting together
you're going to form a close friendship
I'm sure you know people that go to battle
like a literal war
I'm sure there's a very close kinship that forms
and look in a spiritual sense
when we go to war
there is a kinship that forms
as you're together on the same team
I mean when your church is in the heat of battle
and everybody's against it
and you stand together
don't you end up feeling closer to the people
that are there with you
that's what takes place
and those 600 men were with David
and you form a very very close connection
here's what I'm saying
there are people that
they're not trying to use you
they're not taking advantage
but when it comes to having to actually suffer
as a result of being friends with you
it's like you know what this is too far
I don't want to be friends at that cost
they go in your bible to Matthew 26
Matthew 26
hey honestly when you think in the bible of the big betrayal
I mean Judas betraying Jesus
but you know not only that
I mean because the thing is a Judas is a Judas
it is what it is
but he's not saved
but then all the disciples just
reject Jesus at that moment
and here's what it says in verse number 56
it says then all the disciples
for sook him and fled
all the disciples forsake him
now go to verse 73
go to verse 73
you know something I've thought about a lot of the last couple years
and you see this in the bible that all the disciples forsake him
they don't want to be associated
and why is it in those moments
a lot of people are going to disassociate
well here's the thing
if you're friends with someone
and you're connected to someone
people are immediately going to link you to that person
so the thing is
if something's going on with your friend
everyone's going to say well isn't that your friend
isn't that someone you're connected to
and the thing is you can't really stay quiet
because people are going to keep asking you
so you got to kind of make a choice
are you going to side with or against
that's kind of the way that it works
because everyone's going to keep asking you
it's kind of like you're too closely connected
to just be quiet
so what do a lot of people do
they disassociate
why because they don't want the connection
they wouldn't care if people weren't asking them about it
but because of that they're like you know no
I don't want to suffer for this
it's not worth it they just disassociate
instead of just being quiet
they end up going out loud
and make it a point to say I'm not connected at all
it's like why don't you just stay quiet
but the thing is they can't really stay quiet
because everybody's going to ask them about it
so they got to make a decision
so what do they do
well what many people do
is they just will publicly disassociate
right that means that's not true
this is what takes place
in fact we see a great example in the Bible
because notice what it says here in verse 73
and after a while came on to him
they that stood by and said to Peter
surely thou also art one of them
for thy speech bereithy
what the Bible is saying here is
you know this this person comes to Peter
says no no no you are certainly connected to Jesus
because of the fact I can tell via your speech
I mean your speech will connect you to people
it's reality
and they say you're talking way too similarly to Jesus
it's like your speech shows you've been with Jesus
so notice what Peter does in verse 74
then began he to curse and to swear
saying I know not the man
and immediately the cock crew
see the speech of Peter connected him to Jesus
and in order to disassociate
you know what he did
he made it a point to speak
like he would not normally speak
cursing and swearing why
because nobody connected to Jesus
would speak like this
and that's exactly what he did
so he would not be connected to Jesus Christ
look obviously Peter was a great person
awesome person
obviously he learned from this
but you know what
Jesus kind of reminds Peter of this
where he says love is thou me more than these
if you notice he says it three times
I believe the reason he says it you know
three times
you know feed my sheep
feed my lambs why
because he denied Jesus three times
and of course that you know
makes Peter very sad that he actually did that
what you're seeing is in that moment
you know what
Peter's like it's going to cost me
being friends with Jesus
it's going to cost me being connected
and it's like I don't want to be that
closely connected
I don't want to get in trouble
I don't want to get executed
I don't want to get persecuted
what does he do
he speaks in a way
and ungodly and wicked way
so he will not be connected with Jesus
go to Bible 2nd Timothy chapter 1
2nd Timothy 1
I mean one thing you have to ask yourself is this
how great of a friend are you
because in that moment
Peter
just bailed
Peter's spoken away
where no one would connect him with Jesus
why because he did not want to be associated
and the question is this
you know how good of a friend are you
so let me tell you something
being a friend when
it's all good
and there's no problems
that's really not a high bar on being a friend
but if you're a true friend
you will be there when it hurts you
when it might not benefit you
you will if you're a true friend
you will be there
when the connection actually has a negative effect on you
and not a positive you say why
because being a neighbor
is just simply being there
when someone needs help
but if you're a true friend
you're going to be there when it hurts
I mean the Bible says this
a friend is born for adversity
because the thing is
in those times you have adversity
and you need help
that's when you need a friend
look when everything's going well in my life
I'm fine
I'm reading the Bible
everything's going well
but wait a minute
what if I'm in those dark moments
what if I really need help
you know in those moments
you don't need somebody kicking you while you're down
you know what you need
you need somebody helping you
someone trying to encourage you
someone trying to just motivate you
say hey you know what
I'm with you
and I'm not afraid to say it publicly
why
because I want to be a friend onto you
that's what being a true friend is
2nd Timmy chapter 1
verse 15
says this thou knowest
that all day which are in Asia
be turned away for me
of whom are phygeologists and hermogenes
the Lord give mercy onto the house
of an esophorus for he off refreshed me
and notice this
and was not ashamed of my chain
but when he was in Rome
he sought me out very diligently
and found me
the Lord grant onto him
that he may find mercy of the Lord in that day
and in how many things he ministered onto me at Ephesus
thou knowest very well
you know what
when it comes to the life of Paul the Apostle
being his friend
didn't always benefit you
I mean when you're arrested
when you're being persecuted
when everybody's saying negative things about you
I mean being connected doesn't always help you
it can hurt you sometimes
but wait a minute
what does it mean to be a friend
because remember what we saw at the beginning of the sermon
the Bible says that if you're going to have friends
you need to show yourself friendly
the Bible says you should be a friend
you should be someone who puts yourself out there
and cares about other people
and so
when are those moments most needed
it's when you're going through a tough time
it's when you're going through a battle
and go in your Bible to Proverbs chapter 27
Proverbs 27
you know in life
I think all of us
we have a tendency to maybe
try to maintain onto things for too long
you know imagine you know a boyfriend and girlfriend
or dating for a couple years
and they're not
they really don't want to get married
but they've already invested a lot of time
so they kind of just keep going
and eventually they end up getting married
but they never really wanted to get married
it's just kind of like
well we've already been down this road
it's like I don't want to start over
well I mean if you don't want to marry them
the better thing is just to start over
you know even in friendship sometimes
sometimes you can be friends with someone
and you kind of have those David moments
where you remember the good times
but it's like that doesn't mean that it's
now
it doesn't mean it's the present anymore
and see the problem with trying to hang on
to friendships that are no longer good friendships
or bad friendships
is that if you try to hang on to that friendship
you're going to find yourself compromising
to keep that friendship
and look you shouldn't have to compromise who you are
and what you believe for your friendships
look I'm not telling you to discard friendship
but I am saying you know it sometimes there's friendships
which honestly it's like
hey you know we were friends at one time
but things are just not the same anymore
now three things I want you to take away from the sermon
number one
you should keep loyal and proven friends
you should strive to maintain and keep
loyal and proven friends
Bible says in Proverbs 27 verse 10
thine own friend and thy father's friend
forsake not
and why does the Bible say that you should not forsake your father's friend
you know I think the reason the Bible says that is
you know if your father's been friends with someone
has probably been a long time
they're probably pretty proven
they're probably someone you can trust
they're probably someone that's not going to turn on you
they're probably someone you can count on in difficult times
the Bible says you know your friend and your father's friend forsake not
go in your Bible to Proverbs 18 Proverbs 18
and look if someone has proven to be a true friend
you should strive to maintain that friendship why
because true friendships are honestly just not that common
they just aren't
and so if someone's proven themselves to be a friend
you want to keep that friend
I mean somebody's been friends with your father for a long time
you want to keep that friendship
that's someone I can count on
that's someone who's going to be there when I need them
that's the sort of friend you want
but you know what if somebody is is not really a friend anymore
sometimes you just have to face reality
and maybe they were a great friend at one time
but I mean if you're heading one direction
and then they're heading the other direction
it's like in order to keep that friendship
you know what you have to do
you have to compromise who you are
or pretend to be something you're not
in order to keep that friendship
anyway at that point you should just forsake that friendship
it's not real
it used to be real
not anymore
the bible says here in Proverbs 18 verse 24
a man that hath friends must show himself friendly
and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother
number one you should keep loyal and proven friends
but number two
you should never stop trying to be a friend onto other people
because the bible just clearly says in Proverbs 18
that a man that hath friends must show himself friendly
and the bible says there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother
and of course you know you would think of a brother being a very close connection
and the thing is you invest time into friendships
a lot of times it doesn't work out
the bible is saying there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother
you know it's like this in all areas of life
right i think about when you ordain people to the ministry
i mean i wish that it was just always perfect and it worked out
but it doesn't
you know i've ordained somebody to the ministry before
and it didn't work out
it failed
had to replace them
didn't work
you say well why don't you just stop doing it
because you know i've ordained people that are good people
right pastor plebneck in poland is a great guy
super zealous soul winner
you know have there been failures at faith word baptist church of people that have been ordained
yes
but there's also pastor corbin wrestle
pastor jonathan shelly
pastor bruce mahiya i mean those are big successes
and so the thing is yeah you've got and look you know everything in life
is about having failure and failure and just overcoming and not giving up
i mean if you were to look at a chart of the top 10 players in nba history with the most missed
shots you know what it's going to say on that list
coby bryant
lebron james
michael jordan
wilton chamberlain
kareem out you say those are like the greatest players ever yeah because if you have a lot of makes
you have a lot of misses too
that's just the way that it works
but the thing is you don't stop why because you do have makes
you do have successes and look there are people that you can find out there
that are going to be a great friend and they will stick closer than a brother
so look if you have a friend that turns out to be a judoist don't just give up on being a friend
if you have a friend that is a backside and quit don't just give up on being a friend because
the bible says a man that has friends must show himself friendly
and the result you can find a friend that stick it closer than a brother
go to first kings 19 we'll close up first kings 19
you know one thing i've learned from experience you know number three is this
that when you lose friendships you often gain better friendships
so the thing is you often try to hang on to something that it's just not the same anymore
and then if you let it go on the other side there's actually better friends of people that
actually care about you they aren't going to bail on you they're actually there for you when you
need them i mean there's better friends on the other side bible says here in first kings 19 verse
19 so he departed then sin found the life of the son of sheffat it was plowing with 12 yoke of oxen
before him and he with the 12th and elijah passed by him and cast his man all upon him
and he left the oxen and ran after elijah and said let me i pray that he kissed my
father and mother and then i will follow thee and he said on to him go back again for
what have i done to thee and he returned back from him and took a yoke of oxen and slew them
and boiled their flesh with the instruments of the oxen and gave one of the people and they
did eat then he arose and went after elijah and ministered on to him in the story this is right
after all the false prophets are killed and elijah's life is mess he's on the run he wants to
end it and then all of a sudden he just wants to give up and what happens he ends up getting
the greatest friend he can have in life i mean elijah and elijah are like right hand men
he's right there for him right and so he lost a friendship i mean his life changed but then
all of a sudden man he's got the best friend he could possibly have that is there with him
every step of the way and i can say that i've learned by experience that when you lose friendships
you often replace with better friends i'm not telling you to bail on a good friend
what i am saying is that you don't want to hang on to something that's fake
you don't want to stop being a friend because you can find a friend that sticks
closer than a brother you don't want to bail on people that are loyal and proven friends
but if you have friendships in your life that are just not the same and you're
headed different directions you need to realize there's probably people who would be better friends
on to you at the end of the day all of us are going to have moments where we feel alone
and we feel like we don't have friends and it reminds me the song in the hymn where the
the hymn sings earthly friends may prove untrue doubts and fears assail one still loves and
cares for you one who will not fail jesus never fails what a friend we have in jesus
at the end of the day when everything's messed up in your life you feel like there's nobody there
and nobody cares about you you know what you're in dwell with the holy spirit for all eternity
god is with you god cares about you just keep doing what's right keep serving god keep reading
the bible keep going to church keep going so any you know what you find in life is you know what
you have ups and you have downs and it's very easy in the downs to just kind of give up
but here's the thing if you just waited out number one you've got jesus that's there with you
and what i believe god will provide i mean god provided elisha elisha in his darkest moment
and it doesn't feel like that when you're in those moments i'm sure there's people in this room
right now you're in those moments and it doesn't feel like that but can't you say from experience
that god does always come through at the end of the day you know what earthly friends are
gonna prove untrue but you know what jesus never fails he is there with you every step of the way
and he's the greatest friend you could possibly have let's close the water prayer your heavenly
father thank you for allowing us to be here today and ask you to help us to apply this
sermon to our lives god help us to be friends unto people help us not give up on that god and
ask you to help to bless everybody in this room with good and true friends people that
actually care about them and stick closer than a brother we pray this in jesus name amen